Amrâlimê
by bonesmad
Summary: How do you pass on when you're leaving everything you never knew you ever wanted behind? what would you do if you could go back? What could have been will always be the most daunting question...
1. Chapter 1

It was bright. That was the only thing he could think as he opened his eyes. He was standing and it was bright. Good more information. His hand went to his stomach, but there was nothing. He was expecting a big hole or something, but there was nothing. So he was standing, it was very bright and there was no blood. Right. Now where was he? How was he even here? He had, had a sword in him a few seconds before. Now he was standing in this… was it a room? A hall maybe. A white hall. He turned around. What was going on?

"Finally he looks around!" He heard a familiar voice coming from over his shoulder. He spun around to see his brother standing only a few feet away from him.

"Fili!" he reached out and embraced him. "I thought I'd never see you again." he pulled him closer before taking a step back. "But you died…" He said taking his brothers arms and looking him dead in the eye. Just confirming it was actually him.

"Yes." He nodded.

"How are you…." He stopped and looked around again. "Are we…"

"And the penny drops." Fili shook his head. "I love you Kili but you do take a while to get to the point." A slight smile passed over the elder brother's face. The general mood between them ensuring the smile didn't last too long.

"We're dead." Kili said solemnly. Fili simply nodded.

"We failed." He hung his head.

"No Kili we didn't." The two of them turned together to see their uncle walking towards them. Kili's heart both swelled and sank at the same time.

"You too uncle?" Kili asked. Thorin simply nodded.

"The line of Durin is no more." Fili's face fell.

"Yes. But not before we retook Erebor." The King said a sad smile passing over his face. "Our people will rebuild the mountain and live there for centuries." Kili felt his brother grip his forearm and he smiled at him. "We accomplished what we set out to do." Thorin continued. "…but the cost was too high" his uncles both reached out and took his shoulders at the same time. Still in synch after all that had happened. "Much too high. My brave sister sons. I am so sorry." The three dwarves embraced Kili was sure he saw tears in his uncle's eyes.

"Uncle we knew what could happen. We knew what we were getting into. And we believed in it too." Fili said, voicing his brother's identical opinions.

"We knew we could all fall." Kili then added. A tear fell down Thorin's cheek slowly.

"And we would do it again Uncle" Fili smiled.

"I guess there is nothing left to do besides carry on." Thorin said after a moment's silence. "Greet our forefathers once more."

"Da…" Fili said under his breath his eyes wide. Kili tried to make his excitement match that of his brother and uncle, but found he couldn't. He had no memories of his father, grandfather or other uncle. He would not have as happy a reunion. They were strangers. He had left far too much behind to be truly excited.

Thorin was the first to break the circle. Raising himself back to his normal height, a great weight having lifted off him now. Kili noted how at peace his weary uncle looked. He had found great peace in death. He took in his brothers appearance properly, he too seemed lighter than before. As if a troublesome burden had be taken away. It had, he supposed, Fili had never truly wanted to be King, he preferred following their uncle. Now he never had to be.

He barely noticed where their gazes rested now.

"Is that it?" Fili asked, stepping away from them. It was only then that Kili came back to them. He turned to see what they were both staring at. A large wooden door that he hadn't noticed before was right before them.

"I would think so." Thorin said stepping towards it.

"Wait!" Kili shouted, not really meaning to. The others turned towards him, shocked. "We can't go yet." he said after a moment's silence.

"Kili we have to. It's what's next." Fili said looking seriously at his younger brother.

"We're not ready to go." He shook his head.

"We have accomplished everything we were destined to." Thorin said.

"What about…" Kili stared at the door again. "… Mother." He finished. A look of realisation passed over Fili's face.

"Ma!" he said. Thorin sighed, closed his eyes briefly.

"I…. I don't think it will be long before your mother joins us. Her heart was fragile enough when we left her. You two were all that really kept her in the world. And now I have taken you from her." Kili felt a surge of guilt wash over him for bringing that pain to his uncle's face. Fili shook his head.

"She was just as invested in reclaiming Erebor Uncle. She knew well what would probably happen." He said nodding constantly, as if trying to reassure himself. He turned to his brother. "We need to go Kili. We're meant to go. Together." He took a step towards the door again, waiting for his brother to follow. Kili just shook his head

"I can't go." He couldn't rip his eyes away from the door. It was so bright it was starting to hurt him.

"Why not." Thorin turned on him, his face growing angry.

"I'm not ready." Kili said almost desperately. It was Fili's turn to close his eyes.

"Kili…" he shook his head. "… its her isn't it." This managed to break Kili's contact with the door.

"I wasn't mean to leave her yet." he heard Thorin sigh, but he was looking at his brother. Fili didn't say a thing but Kili saw the look in his eyes.

"I have led a long hard life." Thorin said, his nephews looking back to him. "I have served my time and fulfilled my duty. You have not." He shrugged then reached out and gasped both their hands, squeezing them tightly. "I must go. I shall see you again my sons." They shared a moment of understanding all three, then the older dwarf walked away from them.

Fili's breathing was heavy, Kili could hear it clearly beside him. They watched as their uncle and leader walked towards the doors. The light brightened and suddenly he was gone.

"What will you do?" Fili asked under his breath. Kili looked at the ground.

"We should go with Uncle. Our place is with him." Kili took a deep breath and took a step towards the looming door.

"I didn't ask what you should do I asked what you will do." Kili paused with tears in his eyes.

"I would go back to her. In a heartbeat. But I don't know how." He said slowly. "So I will move on. With my brother."

He walked purposefully towards the door, only for it to vanish just as quickly as it appeared. Kili blinked thinking it a trick. The door was nowhere to be seen. He turned to look at Fili again barely catching his eye as the room went dark.

Next thing he knew he was standing on the mountain once more.


	2. Chapter 2

Everything was different. It had been mere minutes but everything had changed. The wind was completely gone, and the gripping cold seemed to have evaporated too. He looked around trying to gauge where he was. The mountain looked so different now, not that he'd really taken it in what it all looked like. He couldn't see anyone around, everything was silent. He remembered breathing in the cold fog and having it hurt his chest, now that had stopped too. How long had he be gone? How had he gotten back?

He was mulling everything over when he heard it. A heart wrenching sob that echoed around his head. He heard leapt, it was her. He ran towards the sound, instinctively knowing where it was coming from. He turned the corner and was stopped short at the sight of that flaming red hair. She was on the ground below him, leaning over,

"Tauriel!" he yelled, she didn't even stir. "Taur…" he stopped as he saw the Elven King coming out of the cavern. He stepped forward, knowing Tauriel was not in his favour. "Get away from her!" he growled. The king didn't even acknowledge him.

"They want to bury him..." _Who? What?…_ he thought unsure of what was happening. He turned his eyes to her back once more. "If this is love I do not want it…" his heart stopped as he heard her weak voice. "Take it from me please…" she moved ever so slightly and he realised why she was on the ground. He finally saw what had been there in front of him. He saw himself lying before her, blood on his face, his eyes closed. The world fell from under him. His knees went weak and he couldn't stand. He'd just presumed that he was back, that he'd been given a second chance. He couldn't be more wrong.

"Tauriel…." He whispered, falling forward onto his knees.

"Why does it hurt so much." She said, looking up at the other elf.

"Because it was real." Kili was shocked at Thranduil's words. That was the last thing he'd expected him to say. He closed his eyes tight trying to will the tears away, and when he opened them again he was kneeling by his own head, staring at Tauriel's tear stained face. He watched helpless as she leaned in and kissed his lips ever so lightly. His hand moved to his lips automatically as he prayed he would feel something.

"Tauriel I'm here." He whispered, his mouth mere inches away from her ear. She didn't even feel his breath on her skin. He saw a smile pass over her face and he was thoroughly confused, until she moved again and kissed his gloved hand. That same hand suddenly felt heavy. He looked down to see what was causing it, only to find a glow coming from it. He opened his hand and sighed. His runestone. "No, no it's hers, she needs to keep it!" He said to the air, even as he squeezed it tight.

He reached out to put it back in her hand, and his arm simply passed through her. He felt sick now, his sstomach well and truly knotted. This was the worst thing he had ever experienced and he couldn't really imagine anything worse.

"Kili she wont be able to see you." He lost all reserve when he heard his brother's voice.

"Fili what are you doing here." He said, tears now freely flowing. He felt his brother's hand on his shoulder. He couldn't bring himself to turn and face him.

"You didn't think I'd leave you now did you?"

"She doesn't know I'm here." He said, his eyes now burning. She looked up staring straight ahead. Right through him.

"We're just spirits, brother." Fili said, clearly at a loss how to support his brother.

"You need to leave him now." Thranduil said taking a step towards the she-elf. Kili growled up at him, only to feel Fili pulling him back. "You need to see a healer." Tauriel didn't reply, she was still clutching his hand. He looked back at her face, seeing the torment in her eyes. He reached out again to try and stroke a tear from her cheek. Stopping himself just before he felt that disappointment again. "Tauriel…"

"I cannot leave him." She said gently, brushing some hair from his face tenderly. He could see her breathing was shallow and she winced almost invisibly with every movement she made.

"You are hurt…" her head snapped around to face him.

"You don't understand. I cannot leave him." She repeated. "We were pledged to each other. We were bound irreversibly."

Kili smiled despite himself then, thrilled to hear her finally saying this out loud. It had been known but unspoken between them. One night in Laketown and it had been decided. They had never had the chance to speak the words.

"We would have been husband and wife, and I will act accordingly." She said defiantly. Thranduil simply nodded.

"I shall wait with you."

"Kili…" Fili had tried to remain silent, to let his brother have this moment however how painful. But he couldn't stay so. "…is this true? Did you promise yourself to her?" Kili did not stop looking at her, remembering her every curve and feature.

"Body and soul." He whispered.

"You… you lay with her?" Kili now heard the slight hurt tone in his voice.

"I wanted to tell you." He said finally looking up at his brother. "I wanted this to all be over before I did though, I didn't want this to be tainted with war." He looked back at her. "Now war has destroyed it all."

"I will go inform the others. They will want to lay him with his brother and the King." Thranduil said even though she was barely listening.

"Fili too?" Tauriel murmured after a few seconds. Hand still grasping his. Kili looked back at his brother again, Fili was watching her now. "They would go together." She nodded. She didn't even seem to notice the other elf leaving. She ran a thumb down his cheek then rested her hand on the ground beside his head. Kili reached out and rested his hand next to hers, barely a hair apart. It was only then he noticed the glow his hand was giving off, how if he looked hard enough he could see the ground beneath it. He looked back up at her and they both spoke together,

"My love…"

_Hey all thanks for the amazing response to this been on my mind a while so we'll see what happens!  
and 'guest' this fic is a TOTAL nod to BH I wonder what connects the two… ;)_

_Grace_


	3. Chapter 3

Fili had wandered off not long after the elf king had left. He felt his brother's grief, and that of his beloved, was too private a thing for him to be intruding on. He had taken mere seconds to turn his back on the door and wish to follow his brother. He was just thrilled it had worked. He and Kili had lived side by side their whole lives, they couldn't be separated now in death. He had known Kili had fallen swiftly for this elf, and when she'd healed him he'd sensed her feelings too. Never had he imagined the problems this would bring. Kili would need him now more than ever.

Kili had felt his brother leaving but he could tear himself away from Tauriel. She was staring intently at his still face, the tears had stopped but the pain on her face seemed to be getting worse. She had gone even paler than her usual shade of white. He could see both her physical and mental pain and she was close to succumbing to both. It had been an age when she finally moved again, uncurling her legs from under her she moved slowly and came to rest her head on his chest. His heart leapt as he was thrown back to the last time she'd lay like that, in the boat on the edge of Laketown. Away from prying eyes, where they'd really gotten to know each other. Where he'd truly fallen in love. They'd watched the stars for hours before stealing back into the Bards house.

He had snuck out for some air, things were starting to feel quite crowed in the small house. Not only was his brother fussing over him, but so were the other dwarfs, the children and Tauriel. He had hated seeming so weak in front of them all. So when they'd all gone to sleep he'd snuck out the door quietly and he'd limped along the paths by the water. It had been barely ten minutes before he felt her presence behind him. He could remember everything said that night, every last word.

"_You are quieter than the average dwarf." She said, knowing he wouldn't be startled. _

"_I never claimed to be the average dwarf." He replied throwing another chip of wood into the river. _

"_No you did not." He stayed silent as she sat down beside him, keeping her feet underneath her as they would hit the water if she didn't. "You should be resting."_

"_I wanted to get some air." he shrugged. _

"_You will live under a mountain soon. You should get as much as you can." He looked up to see a slight smirk playing on her lips. _

"_You have great faith that we will succeed." _

"_I have seen your resilience, and I believe you will triumph." He threw another piece in and watched the ripples spread out across the water. _

"_Why did you stay?" she looked at him, saying nothing. "Why did you save me?"_

"_It was the right thing to do." She said simply. He gave a half hearted laugh. "I wanted the chance to get to know you properly." She said in the quietest of voices. He lifted his hand and rested it on hers between them. _

Her hand was grasping his arm, pulling him as close to her as possible. He took a deep breath and reached out to put his hand on hers, stopping just short. His hand hovered over hers and he tried to imagine the warmth he should be feeling off her skin. She heaved a dry sob again and this spurred him on. Letting his hand drop he sighed as it just passed through hers. He could barely look at their hands, it was almost making him sick. He was shocked though when she looked up and curled her fingers back. Looking around clearly startled she was now on high alert.

"Is there someone there." she whispered eyes still scanning. He felt like his heart was racing, not that that was really possible. She had definitely felt him.

"Tauriel!" he said hope springing into his voice. "I'm here! It's me!" her fist curled into a ball, and her shoulders fell again. He reached his hand up and tried to cup her cheek. Her head snapped around and she looked through the mountain entrance. Thranduil had returned with a band of dwarfs clearly coming to move him. He hated that he recognised none of them. The all looked uncomfortably at the she-elf, the eldest of the group stepping forward.

"We have been sent to recover the prince Miss." He said gruffly. He had a long red beard in three long braids, Kili figured he must be one of Dain's men.

"He is dead." Tauriel said bluntly. "There will be no recovery." Kili hated the tone in her voice. The complete defeat in it. The dwarf flinched slightly, it was quite a sight to see such a dwarf shaken by a female's words, but Kili knew she was no ordinary female.

"Yes I… I just meant they've asked us to move him." He stumbled over his words.

"Tauriel you can go with them." Thranduil said, his commanding voice taking over. "You do not have to leave him." A few of the dwarves looked puzzled at his words.

"Let them take me, you need to go inside." Kili said, sitting close enough to her to see the goose bumps on her skin.

She leant down once more and kissed his cheek.

Kili stood behind her right shoulder as he watched the ominous scene before them. Six dwarves lifted him onto their shoulders and carried him away, revealing a dark pool of blood where he'd been lying. They were almost off the ledge when he heard a faint thump. She lurched forward throwing herself on the ground. Kili followed after her not knowing what she was doing.

"Be careful! You almost lost it!" she said cradling something in her hands. "His mother needs to get this." Kili blinked himself in front of her, still not sure how exactly to do that at will. Looking into her hands he saw his runestone. He smiled as she tucked it back into her tunic.


	4. Chapter 4

He stood looking between his uncle and his brother. Still not quite believing they wouldn't just wake up and start talking. He looked over towards Tauriel. She was still standing, barely. Her face was slowly turning green, she must be sick with the pain. From watching her he was guessing multiple broken ribs, strained shoulder, skull fracture and multiple cuts and bruises. It was wonder she could even breathe. She stood at his feet, his body's feet. He didn't know what to call it. It was him, but it wasn't him anymore. It was simply his body, but to her it was all of him that was left. It was all she had to cling on to, and that's what she was doing.

They'd removed all armour and extras from the three of them, leaving them lie in wait to be dressed for burial. She was holding his hand, her fingers running circles over his skin. It must be stone cold by now, and rigid as dead things tended to go. Yet she didn't let go. It had been hours now. She had just sat there, on the stool Thranduil had found somewhere for her. He moved from over his families bodies and sat at her feet staring at his own hands. Feeling utterly helpless. She let out a dry sob once again and his head hung even lower. He had caused this pain. He had fallen in love with her even though he knew this would probably be the outcome. He had let her fall in love with him knowing he would probably die.

"Tell me what I feels like." Fili's voice rose his spirits ever so slightly. It had always had that effect if he was honest.

"What, what feels like?" He asked now looking at his brother's hands. He was sitting beside him, playing with his beard. "Knowing that I've caused her all this pain. That I've left her behind in more pain than anyone should bear alone. Yet still feeling a twisted pride that she loved you so much." Kili muttered shame flowing through him. Knowing that if he couldn't tell his brother his deepest thoughts he could never tell anyone. Literally now.

He looked up and Fili's face just broke his heart even further. The sympathy radiating from it was almost agonising.

"I meant being so in love." He said slowly, clearly still considering the question. "You have twisted the path of life because of her, and I just can't understand how that must feel."

"I don't think I can explain it." Kili looked back up at Tauriel, noticing her eyelids had fallen a fraction. "It's not like anything I've felt before. You know my heads been turned a few times before." Fili nodded, even though he knew his brother wasn't looking at him. "the second I saw her I felt it Fi. We were in the middle of those spiders and suddenly everything stopped and there she was. She saved me from two of them in mere minutes. But all I could think about was how beautiful she was. She refused me her dagger and basically growled at me when she spoke but I was caught."

"So it's true. You just know?" Fili asked. This was such a new experience for them there was very little Kili had had the answer to for his brother.

"I don't think I really knew until we talked in the cells. I knew there was something different about her then but it was after we spoke through the night that I knew I was in love. It was in Laketown I knew she was the one."

"When you…" Fili stopped. Yes he was a dwarf of over eighty, but they were decent dwarves. They had been well informed all their lives that intimate relations before marriage was seriously frowned upon. Especially for princes.

"No!" Kili shook his head to strengthen his defence. "Before that. We borrowed a boat and rowed around talking for hours. She told me of her childhood, her training. I told her about our home place and the tales of Erebor we'd been brought up on. She told me her dreams and fears and I told her mine. There was such harmony between us that night that I just knew. I could tell she was put on this earth to complete me. Despite our differences."

"You know this after just over a week?" Fili said in near disbelief.

"She fills spaces that I didn't even now were empty Fi. You know the way Ma used to glaze over when she talked about Da." Fili nodded in response. "I know why now. The mere thought of her and I light up from the inside out. I should have lived a long life with her. She would have made me the happiest dwarf alive." Fili grasped his brother's forearm and squeezed it in some hopes of reassuring him.

"I can't believe I'll never know that feeling." Kili looked at his brother with new understanding, he hadn't taken the time to think about what his brother had lost he was so wrapped up in his own pain.

"I can't really say I truly understand it Fili. It was so fast and so fleeting, I don't think I was ready."

"Ma would have clattered you across the head." Fili laughed.

"Yes. For so many reasons!"

"Engaged at your age!" Fili said putting on a more shrill voice.

"And to an elf!" Kili added, they fell into laughter as they had on so many occasions before. It stopped abruptly though when Tauriel stood up and walked around to Kili's head. The brothers rose as well and walked to either side of her. It warmed Kili's heart to see his brother becoming so protective over his beloved.

"She looks so ill. She really needs to see a healer." Fili commented and Kili nodded.

"She felt my hand earlier, I know it." He said stepping right up beside her. "I will find a way to talk to her."

"What good will that do. You are dead Kili." Fili said sternly, albeit sadly.

Kili looked towards his brother with a determination in his eyes that Fili had feared he had lost in death.

"This is why I've been let back. She's going to fade if she lets herself fall any deeper into this despair. It's my turn to save her."


	5. Chapter 5

The other dwarves would come in various groups to visit the tombs over the last few days. To pay homage, share grief and seek guidance. The foot of Thorin's resting place was scarcely bare, with each dwarf taking a turn to pay tribute to their fallen king and his kin. Balin and Dwalin were there most often, being closest to Thorin out of the group. Ori seemed quite effected by the loss of those his own age too, coming down often to talk to Fili.

"He is a sensitive soul." Fili had said after Ori's third visit. "We should have given him more time."

Kili didn't reply he was too busy watching Dori cast an eye over Tauriel. No one had questioned her presence, they all knew the bones of the story. But none of them seemed too happy about it either.

Bofur was a god send, he was the bridge between Tauriel and the surviving company. Kili couldn't help but smile as he watched his friend bringing her another mug of water. It was bound to go untouched, but the gesture meant so much. If Bofur would accept her as part of his family the others would soon come around.

"It's been days since she slept or spoke Fili." Kili leant on the slab of marble his body was resting on. The days were torturously slow, he was very grateful to have his brother, and Tauriel was looking weaker than ever. Thranduil had called as often as he seemed able, the newly reclaimed kingdom claiming more of everyone's time. Kili was desperate for him to get her to a healer.

"Tauriel you need to get help." He said once again staring as intently as could at her face. His two hands were on hers in another attempt to communicate. She seemed to feel nothing now, she didn't even flinch as his hands cupped her face.

Her gaze was entirely glazed over now she was looking but not seeing.

"My love you need help." He said distraughtly.

"They say the Lady Dis is almost here" Bofur said, he paused to see would Tauriel react. "Then we can have the funeral." he said slowly and tentatively. At this her head snapped up.

"They cannot take him. They cannot bury him under stone." She said, her voice barely a whisper. Bofur placed a hand on her shoulder.

"It is what we have to do. It is what they would want."

"I don't think I will survive." She muttered.

"You have to my child." Thranduil said from the door, startling everyone present, living or otherwise. "You have to find some strength."

"Why?" she asked looking up at him. The elf king was visibly startled by how changed she was in mere days.

"Because you need to carry on his memory." He countered with a solemnity only he could seem to muster.

"I barely knew him."

"You knew him enough that you are beginning to fade." Bofur said from behind her she went to take a step back towards her stool when her feet seemed to give in. Kili lurched forward to catch her on instinct, as did Bofur and Thranduil though they were further away. Kili got to her in time but she simply passed straight through him and hit the floor with a heart clenching thud. He stood over her, her stomach now in his feet. He jumped back and lay down on the ground beside her to see if she was further injured.

"She has given in to her injuries. Go inform a healer she will need attention, and send someone to show me the way to a habitable chamber." Thranduil said bending down to turn her over, also assessing her head.

"She won't like being taken from Kili." Bofur said as he made his way to the door.

"If we don't take her she won't survive to protest it."

Fili appeared beside him suddenly

"Kili come with me…." He said immediately. "What happened?" he asked noticing the scene around them.

"She's been overcome by her injuries." Kili stood up as Thranduil picked her up with great ease.

"She will be seen too then." Fili said cheering up slightly.

"Her life is in danger Fili. There's something unbalanced with her. Something physical. More than just grief. I can feel it."

"What are you sensing brother? Is she near fading?"

"No it's something else, only weak now, but growing." He frowned. Another dwarf had appeared at the door and was leading Thranduil out of the room.

"I need you to come with me." Fili said just as Kili took a step to follow them. He looked quickly between them both a few times. Incredibly torn he couldn't decide what to do. "It will take two minutes. She is safe."

He conceded and followed his brother down another hall.

"What's going on?" he asked as he followed blindly down corridors he didn't recognise.

"I over heard something and thought you should hear." He said as they slipped through an open door.

"I just don't think its right." Dori said to the crowd around the small table. Kili looked around and found all their company and a number of other dwarves sitting with drinks.

"I don't see the harm." Balin countered setting his own drink down on the table.

"It is no place for an elf." Gloin said shrugging his shoulders. This perked Kili's deep interest and he moved towards the table. "It is a time of mourning for our people. We have lost our royal bloodline."

"She has done a lot for our people. You have all heard the stories." Dwalin interjected, his arms folded across her chest.

"She did that for Kili. Not us." Oin said holding his trumpet to his ear.

"Anything she did for the prince she did for us." Dawlin continued a few around the table nodded.

Kili was seeing red. How dare they question her place under the mountain? If only he'd made his intentions known. No one noticed the door open wider.

"Tauriel has taken ill and I've had her moved to one of the royal chambers that had been cleaned." Bofur said as the whole room turned to look at him. Fili had heard that they'd hastily scrubbed various chamber, including royal residences in case they'd revived any of them.

"You did what?" one of the dwarves Kili didn't know said standing.

"I said, Alei, that I moved her to one of the royal chambers. I was simply coming to ask would Ori look in on her when he had a chance." He said, Kili smiled at his dear friend's strength.

"Why there? There are many beds in Erebor" Dain's man questioned him again.

"She is our friend and ally. She deserves the finest treatment. Not to mention she was to be a princess of Erebor, and I see nothing wrong with sending her to the place that would have been her chambers."

Fili looked around waiting for someone to argue but no such protest came.

"They were promised?" Ori asked quietly, clearly wary of his brothers' wrath.

"Yes. Since Laketown. So perhaps this discussion should be forgotten." They all shuffled uncomfortably.

"We shall think again once Dis has had her say" Dori muttered. Ori stood up, shaking his head at his brother.

"Take me to her." He said to Bofur who smiled at him.

Kili threw his brother a smile and blinked himself to another hall way he didn't recognise. He would have to figure out how to control that. And where Tauriel was.


	6. Chapter 6

He was weary, though he knew he wasn't tired. He felt worn though he knew he had no physical bearing anymore. No body that could actually deteriorate, but the worry he felt seemed to surpass that and settle deep within him. Four days she'd been unconscious now, four days he'd paced at the foot of her bed. It was much harder than the weeks he'd spent watching her at his feet. Her colour had returned barely, she was definitely less green. Her hair was still dull and her cheeks still hollow, but Oin and the elven healers that had been sent to attend to her seemed to think she would awaken. They'd given her water, despite her sleep, and said many chants. Each one had thrown him back to the Bards house, each one had given him visions of her saving him. If only he could do the same. He had followed the elves one day and over heard them speaking it was in a tongue he would never speak but he did not like the expressions their faces held.

Fili had heard talk that the dwarves had completed their tombs now, deep within the mountain near that of their ancestors. Thorin would have his own of course, and the brothers would be laid to rest together. Once he had let his thoughts darken and had wondered briefly where she would be buried. Would they let her rest with him? Would she even want that? She was not meant to stay under stone. He quickly shook the thought away.

"How is she?" he heard Bofur whisper from the door behind them. Kili turned to see his friend peering in.

"The same no…" he started, then stopped. He sighed, he was doing that too often lately. His head was not working right.

"There's no change." Oin took the damp cloth off her forehead the dried his hands. "I don't know what more we can do, we've set her bones, cleaned her wounds and refuelled her as best we could. It's the broken heart she's dying from." Kili's heart clenched. "The elves don't say it but I figure she's well into fading. She may well wake but don't think she'll last."

"Poor girl…"

"I always said those boys would break hearts. I regret it now."

He couldn't remember when they'd left, he'd zoned out as they spoke moving towards her head instead.

"Kili maybe you should take a walk" Fili tried for third time that day.

"I'm alright." He shrugged "It's not like I can get a leg cramp or anything." In his usual response Fili turned and sat in a chair to the side of the room. He was truly grateful for his constant companionship, he just couldn't seem to muster up the words to tell him such. Thankfully he knew Fili knew.

He sat on the edge of the large bed beside her and looked out over the room. It really was truly magnificent, a large bedroom with a roaring fireplace and numerous chairs and benches, there was an adjoining dressing room, which led to a small bathing room. He could almost guess where in the mountain they were from the high windows along one wall. There was even a small reception room. He had never imagined living in a place like this, he'd happily admit he'd never given much thought past the battle. Bofur was right though, if they'd survived to take Erebor themselves these would have been their quarters, in fact Dain probably had a room rather close by. He could have been moving in here by now. He rested his hand on hers again in what he now thought a futile attempt and started talking.

"Just think Tauriel, this could have been our home. These could have been our rooms." He muttered looking around slowly. "I can see it so clearly, you know. Carrying you in the door on our wedding night, you protesting, me probably dropping you slightly trying to get you to the bed. This bed." he said running a hand over the sheets wishing he could know how it felt. "It would be a haven for us, somewhere no one could have an opinion on us." He smiled. "We could have a bookshelf in that corner…" he gestured with his head towards the windowed wall. "… and you would curl up in that chair every evening no matter how cold it grew to see the stars. Probably reading something or another, me teaching you our language and you teaching me yours." He heard Fili laugh. "I could learn to be a good student. Or you could just teach me the basics." He smiled in his brother's general area. "Fili would have been here a lot you know, even though his rooms would probably be just next door. That is only until the dwarfs would all return and some maid would catch his eye." Another chuckle. His gaze rested at the end of the bed and his smile faded. "We could put a crib there in time. A grand one I would make myself." His voice tightened. "They would learn to walk in these rooms, running around. Growing. Beautiful daughters and stalwart sons." He didn't even notice Fili moving towards them. "Our family would have lived in these rooms Amrâlimê…."

"Kili look!" Fili said breaking his trance so suddenly he jumped up. Kili looked to his brother's face automatically, only to follow his eye line down to the bed.

What he saw sent new force through him, her eyelids were flickering ever so slightly, and the hand he had been attempting to hold was lifting marginally off the mattress. He leaned over her as her lips fell open.

It was practically a breath it was so slight but he heard it all the same. Her voice

"Kili…"


	7. Chapter 7

"Kili…" the sound barely escaped her lips but it was the greatest sound he had ever heard.

"I'm here my darling I'm here." He said leaning down over her. "Open your eyes." He willed her to listen, his hand reached up to her shoulders and running down her arms.

"Kili…" she repeated minutely louder this time.

"Kili look." Fili said standing right beside them now. Kili ignored him. "Kili look at your hands" Fili said more urgently. Kili ripped his eyes away from her face and down to her shoulders where his hands were resting.

That's when he saw it, they were resting on her shoulder, not fading through actually resting. This was the first human contact he'd had since the battle and though he couldn't feel it, seeing it was quite a sensation.

"Oh…" he moved his hands to cup her face. "Tauriel open your eyes." He whispered moving closer to her, her hand rose slowly and rested on her forehead, it was the longest few seconds he had ever lived through but finally she opened her eyes.

Those orbs that had filled his dreamed stared up at him granted most of the spark was gone but there was still something there.

"Oh thank heavens Tauriel. Fili help me sit her up." Fili rushed to the other side of the bed to take her shoulder only for his arms to pass through.

"I can't touch her…" he said trying once again. "Just you." Kili stroked a thumb across her cheek and whispered.

"Tauriel can you hear me?" she blinked sluggishly.

"Kili are you there?" once again his heart shattered into a thousand pieces.

"I'm right here! Tauriel. I'm here." He said his voice cracking his face millimetres from hers now. His hands were cradling her head now, fingers raking through her hair, under her chin. "Please…"

"I can hear him…" she said looking around the room weakly, her face moving to a pained grimace.

"I'm beside you." He said as a plea. He closed his eyes and leant in taking her drying lips in his own, his brain flooding with memories of what that felt like. It seemed to send a surge of energy through her and she lifted up from the bed into his arms. He pulled back and rested his forehead against hers.

"Kili my love." She said a smile finally gracing her features. She blinked once more and he knew at that second she could see him clearly. "You're here." Tears filled her eyes while the spark he loved returned simultaneously. His tears flowed freely down his face now, falling onto her hands as he clasped them in front of him.

"I am Tauriel, I'm here."

"How?" she moved to touch his face gingerly, still afraid he would disappear. "I am dreaming." She nodded, still smiling. "You are dead and cold. I must be dreaming."

"No Tauriel." He shook his head, how to explain.

"I don't care. I hope I never wake up."

"You are awake my dearest. You've been gravely ill but now you're awake" he smiled at her unable to take his eyes off hers.

Fili shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other, trying to find anything in the room to look at other than his brother. Most of the time now he felt like he was intruding.

"Kili I'm going to…" Tauriel's head shot around towards the sound of his voice.

"Who is there!" she said as sternly as her weakened voice would allow. "Show yourself"

"It is Fili" Kili held her hand. "Can you not see him?" she frowned intensely.

"Kili there is no one there. Your brother is dead."

"Yes he is I know…" he faltered slightly wondering how to say all this. "…he is as am I my dear. We are only here in spirit." Her face fell and her grip on him loosened.

"Spirits." She said in misbelief.

"We didn't pass on, I couldn't leave you yet."

"But I can touch you, I can feel your breath." She said now pulling herself away from him entirely.

"But I can't feel you. I can't feel anything. I've been here the whole time."

"So why can I only see you now?"

"I don't know…"

"It's because she's fading Kili. She's passing over slowly." Fili said, now standing by the window.

"but she cant see you." He said standing up. "She is getting better there must be another explanation."

"There can't be. You've heard them all, she's fading for you."

"I can't let her die." He shook his head standing face to face with him now.

"What were you hoping for from all this if not to be together again?" Fili asked growing slightly exasperated.

Kili stopped completely stumped. He hadn't thought of that had he?

"This is the problem Kili you never think things through properly you go head first into your first impulse and never think of what will happen. That's always been your downfall. You are dead, she isn't. There is only one way for you to be together again." he held his hands up hoping he hadn't been too harsh.

Kili was bewildered, his brother was usually the one defending him and backing him up, hearing a harsh truth from him was quite the shock. Yet that's what it was a truth. He turned back to the elf still sitting up in her bed.

"Kili what's going on?" she said, her voice tiny.

"It's a dream darling, just a dream." She looked at him with eyes that reminded him of a puppy he'd seen in the Blue Mountains once.

"You're not here?" he took a deep breath

"I will always be here, always watching over you. Watching as you live on."

"I have no home without you." She said, her voice cracking, her tears streaming down her near translucent cheeks.

"Yes you do, live here, join my mother. You are my family. You are part of my family." He sat next to her again taking her hands in his once.

"My head hurts." She muttered, slipping down slightly in the bed.

"You should get more rest, this is not a peaceful dream"

"You'll be gone when I wake up."

"I'll never be gone. I will be in your memories. I love you so much." He kissed the top of her head then laid her down on the bed. As he stroked her cheek again he felt a chill run through him. It was that sense again that something was different about her, there was something new radiating around her.

"Amrálimé…" she whispered. Kili stayed by her side until he was sure she was sleeping soundly.

"Kili I'm…" Fili started stepping towards him. He just raised a hand and walked out of the room.


	8. Chapter 8

He wandered aimlessly for hours. Getting more lost with every turn he took, caring less with every step he made. Someone could follow him easily though from the random scattering of furniture and rock that was thrown around in his wake. Although if anyone had seen it as it happened there would have been mayhem. He'd ripped benches from the ground and slabs from ledges in an attempt to vent his frustration. He couldn't get his head straightened out. Everything was just spinning around. Fili was so right, he hadn't thought this through whatsoever. He wanted to be the one to save her this time, he didn't want to just leave her. He had not for a second tried to think of a plan or action, of a desirable outcome, or even an outcome. He'd just wanted to get back to her in that second. Then when he had, he'd just lived in the moment. Taking it second to second. He fell to his knees on the balcony he had finally stopped at. His chest was heaving, his head was reeling and his heart was broken. All of this was harder than the most basic of facts. He was dead.

His time on earth had come to an end but he'd been too stubborn to accept that. As always he'd been too obstinate to do the correct thing just because he didn't agree with it. How did he know that she wouldn't have pulled through without him? How had he been so sure that she'd even felt the same way about him? She was practically immortal, she might have forgotten him and found another to spend her life with. He had never been so selfish in his life. He was now making it harder for her too. Making her think there was hope.

He let out another shout and slammed his fists against the ground. He knew that if he felt something from the action he might have calmed down a bit, but he couldn't even get that relief now. How could things be so unfair that he couldn't feel anything physical anymore yet the emotional pain was all the more real?

His shout turned to a sob and his head joined his fists on the ground. He'd only wanted to save her. Now he'd condemned them both to more pain.

Fili had stepped into Kili's place beside Tauriel's bed, he felt that was the thing to do in his brother's absence. He knew from experience that going after his younger sibling would most likely make things worse. He watched the sleeping elf and thought about love again. A subject weighing heavily on his mind lately. True she was beautiful, that was without a doubt, no matter her race. Yet he still could not imagine loving anyone as desperately as Kili clearly did, no matter how beautiful she was. She was sleeping fitfully now, he really wished he could call a healer or Oin just to check on her. She couldn't be having a peaceful rest after what had just happened.

He was worried that he had been too harsh on Kili. He hadn't meant to belittle his motives or emotions, but sometimes Kili needed a slap of reality. He'd almost given it when Kili was in the throes of his imaginary future, but that would have been cruel. He couldn't imagine thinking of such things was helping though. It was like rubbing salt in a wound to be thinking about what could have been. Fili knew that from experience, that was how he'd spent his time in the white hall before Kili joined him. Thinking about what could have been. What could have happened if he'd stayed in the Blue Mountains as his mother had pleaded. What could have happened if Kili hadn't been shot in the leg and they'd all arrived at the mountain together. What could have happened if he'd seen that Orc coming. It did no good. It never could.

He had been quite shocked by the story spouting from his younger brother's mouth if he was honest. He'd never imagined that Kili could want such simple pleasures from life. A family and a home. He thought his brother would be off fighting Orcs and concurring kingdoms for as long as he could. That's what he'd always said as they were growing up. He wanted to be a warrior a brave soul that no one would forget. He'd never considered that he might settle down, give him nephews and nieces. The thought both warmed and chilled him at the same time. A lovely though but a sad reality. Why could things not just be simple?

Kili could have been gone days for all he knew. He had finally picked himself up off the ground and began stumbling his way back to Tauriel's room. He was sure Fili would have stayed at her, but he was internally punishing himself for being so selfish.

He was truly lost, funny that this place could have been his home yet he could not find his way around what so ever. He tried blinking once more, thinking of nothing but the elf he loved. When he opened them again he was still staring at the same blank wall. He must not be thinking clearly enough.

His train of thought was suddenly interrupted by the sound of loud sobbing echoing around the halls. He tried to dull the thoughts in his head enough to concentrate on the sound to follow it. It took a few wrong turns, but he was almost thankful the sobbing didn't seem to be letting up. He finally found the source though, coming from a doorway he found vaguely familiar. He walked through the door and realised why.

He was back staring at three dwarven bodies that were incredibly familiar. Back in their waiting tomb.

The sobbing was echoing even louder now, reverberating off the walls with a painful wail. Kili took a deep breath to try and steady himself to go see her properly.

Their mother.


	9. Chapter 9

Looking at Fili and Kili one would quite often wonder if they were truly brothers. They were as different in appearance as day and night, and their temperament was almost just a dissimilar. Many people thought it a joke when they learned they were brothers. If you knew their mother though there was no question of their relationship. She had the dark colouring of Kili and Thorin and the same temperament as Fili. Her eldest son was the image of his father but had his mother's heart and way of thinking. The Lady Dis had been a legendary beauty in her time. Her hair was full and jet black falling in curls down her back. In recent years streaks of white had coloured her temples just like her brother, though hers crept into her thin sideburns, another trait Kili seemed to have inherited. She like her siblings was quite tall for a dwarf, with a face of great beauty admired by all that saw her. Her beauty was matched by her kindness and equally her temper, as was the way with all of the line Durin. While dwarven women were greatly prized and usually kept hidden from general view, Dis had worked tirelessly to aid her father's people after Smaug arrived. When her husband had been cruelly taken and her boys needed her all the more she had stepped back and kept her family close, trying to keep what little she had left safe.

Looking at his beloved mother now Kili barely recognised her. Her intricate braids were in disarray, fallen from her head down around her face. More grey had taken hold of her hair than when he'd last seen her and her face had aged with worry. Her form seemed withered too, baring no resemblance to the strong sturdy dwarf that had bid them goodbye.

She was on her hands and knees on the floor of the tomb, sobbing uncontrollably, her head rising every few minutes to gaze once again on the bodies of her kin, as if to see if it was still true. Kili wanted nothing more than to run to her arms and have her stroke his hair as she had countless times before. He was utterly helpless again. It was torture.

His mother had always been the strongest person he knew, even more so than their Uncle Thorin. She was resilient and fair and would comfort them in times of pain as soon as tell them off. Now seeing her so broken he really felt the weight of what the war had brought.

He didn't even hear the door opening he was so busy watching her, she heard it though and rose startled. It would make sense she didn't want anyone to see her like this. She had always strived to appear as irrepressible as her family was deemed to be. Kili turned to watch as Balin and Dwalin stepped towards her, heads hung low.

"My dear Lady…" Balin started as she stood and rushed into his arms, head burying into his shoulder. The sobbing had stopped. Silence filled the chamber. It was an age before she stepped away and gave Dwalin a matching embrace.

"You came quickly." He said gruffly, not that anyone would notice.

"On eagles wings." She said softly. Kili's heart leapt as he heard her voice for the first time in months. "Please tell me it is not as it looks. Tell me this is all a ruse." She looked between the brothers.

"You know I would if I could. The price has been high. But we will sit in Erebor for generations to come." Balin rested a hand on her arm.

"What generations have my family now." She said stepping away towards her brother.

"We'll be outside when you need us." Dwalin said as they took their leave. Dis said nothing. Now she had to say her goodbyes.

"My King under the mountain." She whispered. Kili stepped forward until he was standing at her shoulder, felling an immense need just to be near his mother. "Take a well-deserved rest my brother. Kiss our loved ones for me." She grasped his stone like hands and kissed his forehead tenderly. Taking a second to gaze at her older brother Dis stilled, Kili looked on as the tears began to wet her cheeks again.

When she turned to Fili's dais a thought came to him, maybe he shouldn't stay for this. These were a mothers last words to her children. Words he was not meant to hear. Words she only shared now that they were departed. Yet he was frozen to the spot as she reached out and took her eldest sons hand.

"Little lion." She said, her resolve clearly breaking. Kili felt the ghost of a smile pass over his face, Fili hated that name. "I am so proud of you. You would have made a fine king I know that. But I also know you were the finest of dwarfs." Her voice cracking yet still holding its strength, her knuckles were white from gripping his hand so tightly. "You have no idea how honoured I am to have seen… to have seen you grow up." She moved to Fili's head and slowly took out his bead, tenderly re-braiding his hair as she had so many times before. "Good night my darling love." She said after an oddly peaceful few minutes. Kili couldn't tear his eyes away from his mother's hands as they moved calmly and quickly around the strands, he'd hated when she tried to braid his. He hated sitting still for too long and she took such relish in braiding her son's hair that it always seemed to take forever. His mind moved back to the elf he'd left sleeping. How would it have felt to have her braiding his hair? How would it have felt to watch her braid their children's hair? His thought were (thankfully) interrupted as Dis stepped away from Fili towards his own resting body.

"Kili…" she shook her head, her hand moving up to cover her mouth. Though it was unable to hold in the sob. "My baby." Her eyes welled with tears. As she rested her head on his chest, her cheek lying on the undershirt she herself had stitched. Kili couldn't resist anymore, he leaned over and placed a hand on her shoulder, once again he was simply passing right through the living. But the thought of touching her eased him slightly. "You said you'd return to me." She whispered into his chest. "You both did." Her hand was gripping his shoulder. "Why can't you ever just do as you're told." She squeezed her eyes tight allowing large tears to roll down, darkening his shirt. She rose slowly, stiffly and cupped his face. "You had so much life in you. The perfect little boy. The perfect young dwarf. I love you." She said stroking his face. Her hands moved up into his hair and a sad sigh escaped her. "Tangled as always." She brushed strands back and behind his ears. Pulling together a thick strand at the side she started humming quietly to herself as she raked her fingers through it. He recognised the song immediately, as he should. It had been the sound that he heard drifting off to sleep his entire childhood, the lullaby he heard as he was soothed after a nightmare. Now she was singing it for possibly the last time.

He was in quite a trance after a few minutes as she tidied his hair, stroked where his beard would never grow. He was so dazed that when she spoke again he actually jumped.

"Balin…" she called out. Rubbing his shoulder once more. The two dwarfs had stayed right outside the door as they'd said, and were back inside within seconds. "…when are we to bury them?"

"There is nothing set, we were waiting for you." He replied, Kili watched as his face filled with concern for his mother. Balin had always been so good to them.

"And for…" Dwalin started and Kili's head shot towards him, he knew what was coming next. He stopped though and stepped towards Thorin. "…everything." He finished pitifully.

Kili wondered who would be the one to tell her of the elf she would have called daughter.

"How can this be life's plan?" Dis continued, clearly not noticing Dwalin's interjection. "Three lives cut down so early. Three honourable dwarfs ended so cruelly."

"They died as honourably as is possible Dis. They shall be remembered forever." Balin said stepping up beside her, Kili had to walk away. He knew they would never sense him, but he was still naturally moving like he lived, like they would feel him.

"Somehow that is not quite the consolation you wish it to be." Dis smiled at their family friend. The three of them stood together looking over their fallen loved ones.

"We have prepared a room for you." Balin said after an age, Kili had noticed how much people favoured silence in times of great grief.

"When are you going to tell me about the person who has been sitting with Kili." Dis said turning on them.

"How…" Dwalin grunted in surprise.

"There's a stool beside him, and his shirt smells of flowers and the breeze." She said coolly. Kili let out a surprised laugh. He should have known his mother would notice.

"He became promised along the quest." Balin said shooting Dwalin a look asking for support. Dwalin crossed his hands across his chest. "He fell in love Dis. I didn't know until he was gone."

"Of course he did." Kili winced waiting for a scolding, which of course would never come. She turned to his body and sighed. "My foolish boy. I knew when someone caught you it would happen quickly. Silly boy. So young." She shook her head. Kili detected no anger there though. "She must still be here?"

"Yes, she is not well. She is recovering under Oin's care." Balin continued.

"Not well?"

"She fought with us in the war, gallantly. An excellent warrior. But she was greatly injured and refused treatment. She stayed nearly four weeks at Kili's side until she was overcome by her wounds."

Kili saw his mother's face stiffen at the comment.

"A warrior?" she questioned. Kili could imagine his heartrate quickening as he watched her eyebrow rise. "I know Thorin would not let a female dwarf fight."

"Her name is Tauriel." Dwalin finally opened his mouth again. "She will have to answer your questions. We do not know enough." 

Dis turned once more to what was left of her family and bowed towards her brother. Kili could see her muttering something he could not hear as she pulled something out from the collar of her tunic. Kili recognised the golden locket from across the room. The only thing his mother had possessed from Erebor. He knew it held a lock of their father hair. Now she was clutching it tightly, bringing it to her lips for a kiss.

"Take me to her."


	10. Chapter 10

She couldn't pull her knees close enough to her chin, the blanket had been long forgotten yet she was still burning up. Her shoulder ached, her head throbbed and every breath was like a stab in the side. None of this compared to the pain in her heart, or the sensation in her stomach. She was pretty sure she could bore a hole in the wall over the fireplace with her eyes. They had settled there and she couldn't muster up the energy to move. Oin was muttering something to himself at the table he'd moved beside the bed but she couldn't make out any words. She was pretty sure if she moved her head in any direction she would faint away again. Yet this was the best she'd felt in weeks, if best is even the word you can use when one still feels utterly annihilated.

She was trying her best to think of how long ago everything had happened, the battle could have been months ago. Laketown lifetimes back. Everything since the tear down his cheek was both a blur and a prolonged torture. Right up until that dream. Everything in that was vivid and solid. Especially him. She still had the ghost of his kiss on her lips, goose bumps from his breath on her cheek and tears in her eyes from his words. Never had she had such a dream before, although she had not experienced a lot of what had happened the past few weeks before. He had seemed so real to her though. Her heart had truly soared as he'd come into view sitting on the bed beside her.

Her eyes overflowed again as she once again realised reality. He was gone. She'd placed everything she had on her faith in him and lost it all. He had instantly become such a focus in her life, it was soul crushing every time a wave of awareness hit her. He was no more. Her eyes unfocused from the wall in a moment of muscle protest, they came to rest next on the chair by the window and a new wave hit her. A vision almost, of herself sitting in that chair, legs curled up under herself, holding a large book. She watched herself as she looked up towards the door, the vision grew to show the door opening and a smiling Kili coming through the door dragging his bow and arrow behind him.

She slammed her eyes shut and wedged her knees up into them, tears now burning her skin.

"Have some water dear." Oin said a hand coming to her shoulder causing her to flinch. She managed to cast one eye across at the older dwarf. He had been so kind. She didn't deserve it. She was a burden they did not need on top of everything else that had happened their people. She tried to move her hand up to take the mug but her arm simply trembled. The dwarf smiled and held the mug to her lips. She tried to swallow a mouthful but it just hurt. He didn't force it on her though, clearly pleased she had even tried. She rubbed the water around her mouth to try and ease the dryness, then opened her mouth.

"May I go to him." She said slowly, her voice was not as hoarse as she'd assumed, perhaps she had been talking in her sleep.

"Not yet. When you can drink unaided." He replied and started shuffling around at the table again.

She heard a faint sigh coming from the opposite side of the large bed and her head whipped around as fast as her weary bones would allow, only to find an empty seat. The dream coming back into the forefront of her thoughts.

/ / / / / \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

"When you can drink unaided." Fili heard Oin say and he couldn't help but sigh. He wanted to know what the old dwarf was muttering to himself across from them. Whatever he wasn't telling Tauriel he also wasn't telling him and it was getting very frustrating. He found he really didn't like being ignored, if even unintentionally. He needed Kili to return soon. Tauriel had been awake for about twelve hours now, after sleeping away another day. She'd shot up in the bed, then seized up from all her injuries. Ever since she'd just been staring or moving obediently when Oin asked.

/ / / / /\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

At sometime or another everyone thinks about the day they might someday introduce the person they've decided to spend the rest of their lives with to their parents. Kili even had laughed to himself at the thought of Fili bringing a poor darrowdame home to meet their mother. This was a scenario he had never envisaged though. Dis was walking slowly through the corridors of Erebor her hand resting on Balin's arm, though she was refusing to lean on him. Kili could see her eyes probing around the halls, taking it all in. she commented on something every few minutes.

"It is as if we never left." She muttered once and Balin nodded.

"There is a lot to rebuild." Was another brief comment she made as they passed a collapsed wall. Kili was growing more and more anxious as they went, the pace so slow that he had ample time to think of how badly this could go. His worry was fuelled by the constant vision of Tauriel's terrified face when he'd told her it was a dream. She was strong he knew that, but he didn't know how she'd fare against his mother's wrath in the state she was currently in.

The small group stopped at the foot of the stairs Kili thought led to the royal chambers.

"She is staying here?" Dis asked quietly.

"Yes, Bofur made the decision to treat her still as Kili's fiancé. She's in your brothers old quarters." Dwalin said waiting for her lead to start ascending the steps.

"I… who is she Balin? What has Kili done?" he heard his mother whisper as she looked up the steep steps.

"She is a maid of great strength and honour who joined our cause wholeheartedly and grieves desperately for your son." Kili felt a grin spread across his face, he'd always known Balin was the wisest of dwarfs, even if he'd never said that out loud.

"Surely not a human?" she looked up at him with a look that Kili couldn't categorize.

The brothers ignored it awkwardly and both forged ahead up the stairs.

/ / / / /\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

Fili hear footsteps and voices, something quite foreign to these halls the past few days. Oin clearly heard it too, though suspiciously his horn was nowhere in sight. Tauriel made no reaction.

He stood up awaiting the arrival of a group, purely from habit, not because it made any difference.

The door opened and he knew instantly there was going to be trouble.

"Ma…" he muttered catching Kili's wide eyes.

/ / / / /\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

Kili stared at Fili and waited for the shouts to begin. His eyes drifted and widened even more at the sight of Tauriel sitting up in bed. He started towards the bed then stopped as her eyes locked on his, her chest started heaving, her breathing quickening. She could still see him. He slowly shook his head and she gave back a single nod.

"Tauriel." Dis said from the doorway, and the elf's eyes moved towards her. "You are Tauriel?" the female dwarf asked, as if hoping for an answer she wasn't expecting.

Tauriel nodded again, just as slowly.

"Leave us." Dis said calmly and the three other dwarves turned and left. Dwalin looked exceptionally relieved Kili thought.

Fili made to walk towards the door but stopped as he stood facing their mother, the pain in his face that Kili saw was exquisite.

/ / / / /\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

Tauriel's heart was beating too fast, her head was feeling light and she thought she may be sick. How was this happening there he was standing in front of her again? Clear as day. Just like the dream. She was losing her mind that was the only explanation. He shook his head and she knew not to speak.

"Tauriel." She turned her attention to the source of her name. The dwarf standing before her, she knew instantly who it was. The striking dark looks and general regal air surrounding her. This was Kili mother. The mother he would never return to. "You are Tauriel?" She said breaking her trance. She nodded again, unable to find any words.

"Leave us." She sounded so like her brother, commanding and sure. Even after losing everything she was still able to stand there and demand the esteem of everyone in the room. She risked darting her eyes over to where Kili stood briefly. Just to check he was still there. He was but he was staring at a blank space in front of his mother. Tauriel looked back at the female dwarf, the last in her lineage, and moved her legs over the side of the bed. She stood up slowly and made her way around the bed. Dis hadn't said a word, she was still just staring at her. Tauriel felt her knees shake beneath her but she was determined to greet her properly.

"It is an honour to finally meet you." She said shakily, bowing as much as her ribs would allow her. She saw Kili move towards her from the corner of her eye but she ignored him.

Watching Dis' face she was struck by the familial similarities she saw, the dark heavy eyebrows the deep loving eyes. But she also noticed how the dwarf's lip was curling slightly and her nostrils flared. She did not think she would be able for an altercation today. Many moons seemed to pass as they looked at each other, the tension in the air grew heavier. Tauriel had never been so terrified.

"Sit down child. Before you fall down." Dis said finally. Tauriel was afraid it was a test. "Sit! You are clearly still in great pain." She said again gesturing to the bed. The elf took the advice this time and nearly collapsed onto the end of the bed. Again she saw Kili moving just outside her vision and it took every ounce of her diminished strength not to look at him. Why was her brain doing this to her. Did things not hurt enough as it was?

/ / / /\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

He just wanted to reach out and catch her, cradle her in his arms until she was better. But he couldn't. she could still see him but no one else could, he couldn't risk them thinking her mad. His mother was incredibly calm and it was extremely unnerving. He was waiting for her to talk again.

"Balin tells me that you…" Dis said slowly. "Balin tells me you fought with them in the battle. That you defended my kin greatly."

"I did what I could ma'am yes." Tauriel nodded.

"Why? You are an elf of Mirkwood no? You had no obligation to the dwarves of Erebor." Kili watched his mother carefully. He had never seen her like this.

"I believe you know the reason."

"I need to hear it from you. For I cannot believe it myself." He heard a quiver in his mother's voice now, he had only seen her cry once but he believed that was about to change.

"I renounced my king and people for the love of your son." Tauriel said gently her head held high.

"And my son returned this love?" Dis was moving closer to Tauriel ever so slowly.

"I truly believe so. He pledged himself to me. We were to be married."

Dis wrung her hands together then sat on the end of the bed beside her.

"Then my child, we shall grieve together."


	11. Chapter 11

Fili ran a hand over the tapestry on the wall. He hated that they could still touch objects, just not people. The dust that came from them danced in the air before him. The whole room was covered in years of dust. He was in the rooms besides Tauriel's but this one had not been cleaned. He tried to imagine it cleaned out, it would have looked much the same but this could have been his. He could have set up home in these rooms and lived for decades more. The room was untouched just dusty, with a faint smell of smoke in the air. The bed wasn't even made, it looked like someone had just rolled out of bed. On the dresser there was various bottles and boxes, and a golden comb that had gone dull from years of abandonment. On the bad of a chair he realised was a dress, laid out and ready to be worn. This could have only been one person's chambers. His mothers.

He took it all in and tried to see her in there. Tried to imagine her sleeping only to be woken roughly and told of the dragons coming. She must have fled immediately. Her old life was in this room yet she hadn't even come near it yet. She was still sitting with Tauriel.

He smiled to himself as he sat on a low bench that still had a book sitting on it.

His mother was remarkable.

/ / / / / / / /

Many of Kili's fondest memories of his mother we're sitting together as she told him stories of the old dwarves, usually when he was going to sleep or he was fed up that Thorin had taken Fili training without him. Now he sat and watched as his mother sat beside Tauriel's bed telling her stories of Erebor.

They'd yet to talk about the great sadness dragging them down, they were simply getting comfortable with each other. He knew Tauriel would be finding it hard, still being so helpless. But she seemed to be hanging on Dis' every word. He had taken a seat at the wall just out of her eye line, he'd noticed she was purposefully avoiding looking at him. He had no idea where to go from here.

He sat up as his mother stood, he hadn't heard the end of their conversation.

"We must move ahead with the burial." Dis said walking towards the fireplace. "I am here so there is no reason to postpone it any longer." She said staring at the flames. "Dain will feel unsettled until it is over."

"I have yet to meet him." Tauriel said quietly. Apparently avoiding the topic.

"I am sorry to say he Balin has told me he is not one of your allies."

"I know the hatred of elves runs deep within dwarven blood. I do no resent him for it. I am still surprised of your acceptance."

Dis turned and smiled at her.

"My two boys were the most important thing to me in the world. You were Kili's choice and that is more than enough for me."

"I have never been to a burial." Tauriel said pulling her knees up close to her chest again.

"I have been to many." Dis said with half a laugh. "We shall get through it together. You shall just need to get strong enough to hold me up."

"It seems so strange to me. Being trapped beneath the ground. Forever more."

"It is not like that at all." Dis shook her head and walked back over to the elf's side. "We are simply putting their bodies to rest in the mountain, leaving a place to honour them. They are no longer with those bodies. They will have gone on to the afterlife, surrounded by their forefathers. Their spirits have left this earth. All a burial is, is a celebration of their lives. No matter how short." The dwarf's eyes were brimming with tears, and Tauriel's were filling just as quickly. Kili watched on as he saw an understanding settle over Tauriel. The concept of burial now a lot less daunting.

"Do you believe they pass over directly?" she asked leaning towards the dwarf princess, her voice was low and heavy.

"I like to think so, very few stories of spirits are told, I believe you would need an tremendously strong reason not to." Dis studied the elf closely "Why Tauriel have you…"

"No no…" she cut her off quickly. "…I simply wondered. I have had many dreams of such and I wish it could be true."

"I know the dreams can hurt, but believe me when they stop you will miss them." They sat in silence holding hands.

/ / / / / / / / /

Sleep was something Kili greatly missed, the sheer thought of just resting was something he now longed for. Though he would never be tired again, as he looked at his mother's peaceful (if tear stained) face he envied her. Even Tauriel was resting more calmly, the colour returning to her face bit by bit. He took the quiet moment to slip out of the room and into the one next door.

"Fili?" he called out looking around the long deserted chamber.

"Is everything ok?" Fili appeared around a corner clearly worried.

"At ease…" he said light-heartedly, a tone missing recently. "…they're both sleeping. Finally." He said patting his brothers shoulder. "I just needed a walk."

"It's about time you took a break. You'll worry yourself sick." The look Kili threw him was the most severe he'd ever experienced from his brother. "Sorry, sorry I know you have great reason…" Kili shook his head and sat down on a nearby bench. "Our mother has accepted her though. Surely she is safe now?" Fili continued slowly. "Ma will take her in and be her family now. They have each other. We could pass on." He tested the waters. He'd sat in this old room for hours just thinking about where they would go from here. What they could possibly do besides drifting around. He had come up with very little.

"Pass on…" Kili echoed.

"Join Thorin." He continued, moving to step directly in front of his younger brother.

"No. I can't." he shook his head rapidly. "I'm still missing something." He stared at the ground as if it had offended him. Fili went on his knees trying to catch his eye.

"Kili, we are dead. We cannot do any good here. I know you have lost an incredible life, and if I was you I would hang on to it anyway possible too. But you need to see that sometimes you have to let go." Kili finally looked up at him. His eyes dark with stress and worry.

"She can still see me Fili." He said brusquely.

"What?"

"When Ma came in the other day, she could see me."

"She said nothing."

"I know, but she did. She hasn't looked at me since that day, but I am not going anywhere until I know she isn't fading and will survive. I think both of us perishing is not the answer." Fili's eyes then moved to the floor. Kili kneeled down in front of his best friend. "You have been the greatest companion one could ever hope for. You gave me to much in life and now in death. If you wish to join Thorin and Da and the others I want you to know you would go with my sincerest blessing." Fili smiled. "This is my predicament I would completely understand." Fili held up a hand to silence him.

"The day you were born I told you I would stand by your side as your brother and friend until the end of time. Not the end of our lives, not until Erebor, until the end of time. I shall never leave without you." Kili was beaming from ear to ear at Fili's words. They let their foreheads rest againt each others for a silent moment, both thankful for the other. Fili knew he had to be strong for his brother, but he also knew without his brother he would not have any strength.

The peaceful moment was broken when Kili's head shot up and he looked around.

"Something is wrong." He said standing up Fili following close behind.

Without thinking Kili walked straight through the chamber wall into the one beyond. Their mother was still snoring softly, but the large bed was obviously empty.

"Where could she…" Fili started.

"Stay with Ma, I'll be back soon." Kili left quickly.

He was barely around the corner when he saw her. She stood tall but walked slowly. Carrying herself with all the strength she possessed, she looked almost every inch the elf he had fallen in love with. He followed silently a few feet behind knowing exactly where she was going.

The journey was long, but he would attest that she did not once stumble. When she reached their waiting chamber he watched as she pushed the door aside, a pained hiss escaping her. She stopped before walking in. He saw her take a deep breath then walk into the chamber, head still held high.

Nothing had changed in the room. The three of them still lay still waiting for their final destination. She took back up her space beside him, a hand slowly going out to take his.

It had been nearly two months since the battle now yet they still looked like they had on that day, the cold of the mountain he guessed. She stroked his face gently, he sighed wishing he could feel that.

"You stayed silent longer than I thought you could." She said, startling him greatly.

"I… you can still see me. You knew I was following you." He said as she turned to face him. Her face still with calm, her hair flowing freely around her like a cloak.

"I feel your presence like no other in my long life."

"Your life has not been long. Not for an elf." He said

"Longer than yours." He had no reply.

"You can still see me."

"Yes. You have been in my room for days now. Why are you torturing me so?" her mask finally fell and her face changed into one of extreme pain. He felt like his stomach lurched at her words.

"Torturing you?"

"I can see you but I know it to be false, you are dead. But my mind won't give me any rest. You are still here." A tear slid down her cheek, though she had thought she could cry no more.

"It is not your mind Tauriel. I am here. Well in spirit anyway." He stood across his own body from her.

"I know you are lying. You are simply my decaying mind playing a cruel trick on me. Giving me strange dreams and haunting my waking moments."

"That was no dream Tauriel, I told you it was in an effort to make you stop fading. Obviously it did not work."

Her free hand raised incredibly slowly, the other still clutching his hand. He watched as she made to touch his face, her fingers visibly trembling. When her fingertips reached his skin her whole body relaxed. He could feel nothing still (which he cursed inwardly), but seeing a wave of relief pass over her eased his own soul.

"You are here…" she whispered.

"My essence is yes. I refused to pass on."

"For me?"

"Of course." He nodded, placing his own hand over hers, looking up into her tear filled eyes.

"Oh my love…" she whispered. "…what have you done?"

That hit him like a slap in the face

"What do you mean?" he said, his voice cracking.

"No, no I'm sorry I do not mean that. I mean how have you done this, how have you achieved this when no one else can." She looked between his two bodies. "How can you lie here before me cold as stone, yet stand too in front of me speaking?"

"I don't know, all I know is when I was faced with the door to the afterlife all I could see was your face."

A smile spread across her face now, tears still spilling out freely.

"It was like a strange energy was pulling me back, like I was tied to you by something."

She looked over him, then pulled her hand away.

"I think I may know what that was." She muttered so quietly he barely heard her. She took her other hand out of his body's hand.

He watched on puzzled as she moved her hands onto her stomach, which even he could see behind her hair and loose nightgown, had become slightly rounded.


	12. Chapter 12

"How long have you known?" he asked, still standing opposite her speaking over his own body.

"I knew something was unbalanced almost immediately but had no idea what…" her hand now making a circle on her growing bump.

"Oin didn't notice. Or your own healers." He said his eyebrows growing into a deep frown.

"Oin would not know the signs. The elves may have guessed though…" she stopped talking and closed her eyes.

"And?" Kili began moving around the slab.

"…they would have chosen to ignore it. Thinking it an abomination." She said softly hand squeezing the cloth of her night dress. He moved swiftly then getting to her side.

"Not it. Them. Our child." He said placing his hand over hers waiting for her to relax again. "Our baby."

"Our baby…" she echoed a smile slowly returning for a flickering second.

He laughed lightly his eyes glued to her stomach. "What?" she asked looking down at him.

"I'm just impressed with myself. One night." He grinned widely and she huffed at him. Rolling her eyes though a grin was starting to form on her face as well. "Has… I've never heard of a child being born part elf part dwarf." He said after a few moments light-heartedness passed between them.

"Neither have I, though such things have never been spoken about in good company."

"We certainly broke the mould." He nodded. "Though my mother would say I always did."

"She has actually mentioned that." Tauriel nodded.

"She will be your family Tauriel. She will care for you both, love you both. This child will always have a home within the mountain. As will you."

They stood in silence hands moving to clutch each other. He shut his eyes tight willing himself to feel the warmth of her skin, or the cool of it since they'd been down here and age now. Just to feel something.

"I cannot feel your breath anymore." She whispered, though still destroying the stillness of the room.

"I do not breathe anymore my love. What you felt before was only a memory." He said solemnly.

Her breathing grew heavy as that thought passed across her face.

"I did this. You could have lived if not for me."

"Tauriel I did not truly live until I met you. I have said it before and I will say it again, you gave me a reason to be on this earth, and I do not regret that for a second."

"Are you saying you would not change it if you could?"

"Of course I would live if I had such a choice. But if it meant I never found you than I would never choose that. Ever." He shook his head and kissed her hands.

"Why could I not defend you? Why did I fail you?"

"You couldn't save me every time." He smiled. A flutter ran through her.

"Why could I not defeat him?"

"You were sharing your energy with another. I am still in awe that our small child survived the battle." He said obviously changing the subject, and she let him succeed.

"It is a wonder." She nodded.

"You were so badly hurt. She must be strong like her mother…."

"She?" she raised an eyebrow. "You think we're having a daughter?"

"That's what I had dreamed for us. Yes. A beautiful little princess." He eyes teared up for a different reason then.

"Not a strapping son?"

"No I would leave that to… Fili." He said a wave of sadness washing over him. "I would want a little girl I would spoil rotten" she smiled at him.

"A daughter would be such a blessing." Tauriel nodded.

"I wonder what they will look like." he said absentmindedly his thumb rubbing a circle on her stomach again.

"Kili look at you…" she said her hand dropping from his.

"What?" he looked at his hands.

"You're glowing." She touched his face tentatively. A soft golden glow was radiating off his skin he was shocked he didn't feel any different than he had from the second he had woken up in the white hall. Yet now he looked just as solid as he had when he was alive.

"That is new." he raised his eyebrow "Happiness can make that happen I guess." He shrugged and her hands fell by her sides.

"Happiness. Truly?" she asked.

"Of course!" he stressed stepping towards her again, silently cursing their height difference. "Of course its happiness how could you ever doubt that!"

"I just… I don't know everythi…" she started talking, stopping when he took her hands. "Kili you are dead. I have lost you." He clutched her hands tighter and pulled them to his chest.

"No you haven't. You have part of me forever now." He rested their hands back on her stomach, trying to feel closer to her somehow. "I will never be gone."

"I can't do this without you." With each blink he could see more tears filling her eyes. "I can't have a life without you."

"You have to now!" he said "don't you see this answers everything for me." He was getting slightly excited and it was unnerving her.

"What…"

"I came back because I wasn't ready to lose you. Then I saw you were fading and I knew I had to save you. Now you have no choice but to live." His face was glowing even more now, it was almost hurting her eyes. She suddenly ripped her hands from his and moved away.

"Kili no!" she said wrapping her arms around herself tightly. "You are forgetting yourself."

"Tauriel. I can't see you die for love of me. Now you can live for love of our child."

"You can't leave me again." she shook her head rapidly. "I won't survive it."

"I can't stay here. It's not right. But I will see you again."

"I don't want to live without you." She said intensely.

"You can't live with my shadow." He said pulling her down for a tender kiss.

/ / / / / / /

She had been haunted for days now thinking about this unborn child, she'd even thought it was the reason for Kili's presence, a strong mental push you could say.

"We must get you back." He whispered to the top of her head. They had moved to sit side by side at the foot of his resting place, her head resting on his lap while he stroke her long red hair.

"not yet." she muttered.

"I won't leave you yet. We just need to get you back to bed before mother wakes up." He leant down and kissed the tip of her exposed ear.

"When will you leave?"

"I can't say. I don't think it's really a choice. It will just happen." He felt her nodding her head against his lap.

They walked slowly out of the room, she taking a brief second to look back at the bodies they were once again leaving alone.

He looks around as they go for dwarves beginning to mill around, it had to be long past dawn now. They were bound to run into someone, and she was grasping his hand.

This happened much quicker than he'd anticipated.

"Lass what are you doing up and about?" Bofur swept his hat off his head, greeting her properly.

Tauriel was jolted out of her reverie

"Hello…" she said straightening herself up.

"Oin said you are on strict bedrest." He said smiling kindly at her.

"I needed to see him." She admitted readily. Bofur's smile spread.

"Well I won't be telling on you. But I would warn you not to risk the wrath of Dis Oakenshield." He raised an eyebrow. Tauriel couldn't help but smile.

"I'm going back now."

"Are they treating you alright lass?" Bofur asked stepping forward. "Not Dis or Oin, but the others."

Kili smiled at his old friend.

"Oh yes, thank you. You have all been far kinder than you need to be." She said nodding her head.

"What do you mean?" he asked, surprised. "You're one of us now! We look after our own." He bowed again and replaced his hat. "See you soon."

"Goodbye." She squeezed Kili's hand and continued walking down the hall.

/ / / / / / / / / / /

"you should get some sleep." He whispered as she pulled the covers up closer.

"Lie with me?" she asked, her eyes pleading with him. He nodded and scooted up beside her. It amazed him that they'd never had the chance to do this before. "Promise you won't leave me before the burial." She said as her eyes began to close.

"I promise." He nodded.

"Promise me you won't leave without saying goodbye." He moved a hand across her stomach.

"I promise."


	13. Chapter 13

Tauriel was still sleeping soundly when he noticed his mother waking, she stood and looked over the sleeping elf, her face full of very little other than pain. He looked on as she ran her fingers over the edge of the bed covers, tracing the dark embroidery. Grasping it briefly she sighed and then moved quickly towards the windowed wall. She was breathing irregularly, clearly trying to stop herself crying. She took one more deep breath and turned to the looking glass, straightened her hair after a night's sleep in a chair. Dusted down her dress and made for the door. Throwing one more mothering glance over her shoulder at a sleeping Tauriel. Kili stood as she closed the door, trying carefully not to wake her. She stirred despite his efforts and moved into the space he had vacated. Waiting just long enough to ensure she didn't wake fully he followed out the door,

"Fili!" he called down the empty corridor. "Fi…" he was cut off by his brother appearing beside him, causing him to jump slightly. "I don't think I'll ever get used to that."

"What's wrong?" Fili said ignoring the fright he'd given.

"I have the most exciting news!"

"What could you possibly mean? How can you have good news at times like these?"

"Tauriel is having a baby." He burst out with it. Fili's face was the definition of shock. "A child brother." He repeated grabbing his older brother's shoulders and shaking him slightly.

"A baby." He echoed, something new dawning on his face.

"Yes, she is already showing." A smile was splitting his face now.

"Oh Kili!" Fili finally stared to show a reaction. "I don't know what to say!"

"It is good news isn't it?" Kili questioned then. His brother's hesitant reaction dampening the mood.

"Of course it is. A great blessing. I just feel for you brother. And the child."

"It will grow up wanting nothing Fili. It will have mother and Tauriel and a mountain full of dwarves to guard it. And most importantly it will give Mother and Tauriel a reason to smile again." he shrugged letting his brother go. "Yes they will grow up with only stories of their father and uncle. But what stories they will be."

Fili looked at his brother intently, taking in his every word.

"Kili you are crying." He said as he watched the tear tracks growing down his face.

"My child will never know us." He said with a crack in his voice.

"No. but they will live. You will live on." He grabbed the back of his brother's head and pulled their foreheads together. "As will I through your child." He grinned. "Congratulations."

They laughed together tears of joy now rolling down both their faces by the time they calmed.

"She can still see you then?" Fili asked as Kili closed the bedchamber door after checking she was still sleeping.

"Yes, clearly. I'm solid to her." He nodded. "We spent the night talking she must be exhausted."

"That must have… helped?"

"I think so. Of course the child was quite a distraction." He swallowed an imaginary lump. "I've promised her I won't leave before the burial."

"So you are moving on."

"It's time to make things right again, I have been lucky enough to get all this extra time. I'm so grateful." He nodded. "And I can never tell you how grateful I am Fili I would not have coped without you."

"Anything for you brother."

The moment was broken as footsteps could be heard coming closer to them. Dis was returning. The boys turned and watched her in silence. She got to Tauriel's door and stopped herself, looking further down the hall she made her way to what Fili had decided had been her room.

She opened the door slowly and they stepped forward after her. The brothers looked at each other and stopped. Their mother deserved some privacy.

"How is Tauriel going to tell her?" Fili asked still watching the door.

"We didn't discuss it…" he bit the inside of his lip. "… I think she'll take it well." He nodded.

"You seem to have forgotten our mothers temper."

"Well not even she would fly off at a pregnant elf now would she…"

/ / / / / / / / / /

Fili wandered down the halls going nowhere in particular thinking about what his brother had told him.

A child, that was the unbalance he had sensed, Kili had known from beyond death that he had created new life. How extraordinary. How was he ever going to leave? Fili knew if it was him he would want desperately to stay and see his child grow, yet Kili had said they were passing on.

He felt guilty thinking it but he truly wondered if his brother would be strong enough to do so, he had never seen him so changed as he seemed to be for love of Tauriel. He didn't think he could really predict anything his brother could do now.

"Everything is ready…" he heard a voice echoing around the corner. He walked on recognising the voice.

He turned around the corner to find Bofur, Balin and Dwalin standing together.

"Dis has gone to talk to Tauriel." Bofur said. "They will begin it tonight."

"Dain will be pleased. He's been unsettled about taking the throne, this will give him some closure." Balin nodded.

"We should be planning Thorin's coronation." Dwalin muttered. Fili watched as Balin took his brothers arm, they'd obviously had this conversation before.

"How fairs the elf?" Balin asked. "Dis seems to have taken to her."

"She rarely leaves her side." Bofur nodded. "I don't think it's helped either of them though."

Fili couldn't listen to anymore. he thought of their burial was weighing heavily on him. He wasn't sure if he wanted to see such a thing.

"A baby…" he muttered.

/ / / / / / / / / /

Tauriel's first thought when she woke was to reach out beside her, a funny thought since this was the first night he'd slept in a bed beside her, why should it already feel like habit. She was greatly disappointed when her hands caught nothing. She sat up quickly and scanned the room, her years of training allowing her to be fully alert immediately.

"Kili!" she said slightly startled, had he left her already? Had he lied to her?

"Shh girl, it's alright." Dis said rushing over from the far side of the room, behind the bed.

"Oh Ma'am I am sorry I thought I was alone." Tauriel said curling up around herself.

"No no you're not I'm here, it was only a dream…" she said taking the elfs hand and rubbed soothing circles on it.

"Th… thank you." Tauriel stuttered, taking a chance to look around the room and spotting Kili at the head of the bed, on the opposite side to his mother. She sighed

"How do you feel?" Dis asked, the sigh clearly concerning her.

"So much better, I mean that. I feel almost back to myself. Although it is not surprising given I have slept more in the last few weeks than I have my entire lifetime." She risked a smile.

"Good my child, for we have a long night ahead of us."

"We do?" Dis nodded.

"Yes if you are strong enough. It is time to prepare for the burial"

"I knew it would come but I didn't think it would be so soon."

"It has been far too long already. Our customs dictate that we honour the dead then continue living quickly. To have waited this long has been very strange for our community." Tauriel nodded.

"I understand. They need to go to rest."

"Yes. So you and I shall prepare them tonight, the burial will follow tomorrow."

"You and… and I?" Tauriel questioned almost immediately. She studied the dwarfs face thoroughly, looking for some sort of test behind it.

"Yes. The family of the dead prepares them for burial. It is a time for private grieving and final goodbyes. The burial itself if for everyone. The night before is for the family. You and I are all they have left."

"you are their family… I.."

"You and I are family now Tauriel it's time you started to believe that." Dis said giving her hand a final tap before getting up. "I will not let our line end without a proper goodbye." She moved to a chair that held Tauriels clothes.

Tauriel had never felt anything like the guilt that ran through her in that moment. Her hands moved to her stomach without her noticing, her eyes moved to look at Kili who had moved closer to her side. Her eyes were wide, she could feel it. But his were the same. She was pretty convinced that her usually fitted clothing would give her away in a few minutes anyway.

"I wouldn't say it's ending." She muttered, still staring into Kili's eyes.

"What?" Dis asked not even turning from the chair. Kili smiled at her and it was all it took to spur her on. She eased herself from the bed to walk over behind her love's mother.

"I said, I do not think you should call it the end Lady Dis." The dwarf was so puzzled now that she could not resist turning to the elf maid.

"What are you saying?" Tauriel was crying again, her hands still holding her delicate bump.

"There will be another Durin."

/ / / / / / / \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

Kili watched on as the most poignant emotions filled the room around him. His mother cried, laughed, smiled and whimpered in the space of a few minutes, but one thing was constant, her grip on Tauriel's hands.

The two women moved back to the bed, sitting together on the edge and falling into intense sobs together.

It was the first time the two of them had truly let go with each other.

All the fears he'd had seemed to lessen slightly. For a few fleeting moments, until new ones settled in.

"My boy, a father." Dis muttered, her face covered in tears. She closed her eyes tightly. "I should kill him." She said, a smile brightening her face slightly. Tauriel tilted her own head. "A child before marriage." Tauriel still a minute, she had thought that would really be the least of her problems. "Yet I don't care. He has left such a gift. A child of two worlds."

"Their life will not be easy." Tauriel finally spoke again. Kili moved towards her, his heard aching at her words.

"No. but whose life is?"

/ / / / / / / / /


	14. Chapter 14

Silence was something Tauriel was thoroughly accustomed to. Growing up as an outsider in Mirkwood she had spent many hours on her own, having Thranduil as a guardian meant quite a lot was communicated through looks and glares. Even having Legolas as her only friend meant a lot of conversations was mostly filled with stillness. This silence however was a different breed to any shed encountered before. This silence was meant to be filled. Not by the two women moving slowly round the room, but internally by them separately. They were meant to put all their love and farewells into this heavy silence.

She ran a finger over the neat threading on the top shirt in the pile and looked back up at Dis. There was a new understanding between them since their shared soul baring in her room. The news of the child had given them an opportunity to really show how they were feeling behind all the politeness and correctness. They had cried till there was no more tears to shed, then both spoke of the pain in their hearts, Dis dismissing every time Tauriel tried to belittle her own aching in front of the maternal dwarf. A new level of acceptance had been found in those hours.

"I want you to prepare Kili yourself. I will guide you." Dis said gesturing towards the third pile on the table they had, had brought in.

"I can…"

"When will you learn not to argue? A son eventually leaves his mother to create a family of his own, that child growing within you is Kili's family now. You need to do this for him. You are his wife."

Tauriel looked over Dis' shoulder directly into Kili's brown eyes. A smile rose the corner of her mouth as a tear formed in the opposite corner of her eye. She just nodded and stepped towards his body once more.

"What am I to do?"

"We will wash and dress them, braid their hair and polish their weapons ready for burial. Start with washing his wounds and putting a new undershirt on."

Tauriel started the job, slowly working her way over his skin, feeling oddly uncomfortable. She had only ever seen his skin on that one night in Laketown, now she was taking the role of wife treating his skin with sponges and oils like she'd spent a lifetime with him.

"You don't have to do this." She heard Kili's voice coming from beside her, she didn't look up from the wound in his chest as she gently washed it down. Behind her she could hear Dis working away on her son and brother, the urge to reply to Kili was incredibly strong. "Tell her you can't and walk away. I don't expect you to do this."

"I want to do this." Tauriel said firmly. Dis looked up at her but stayed silent, taking the statement as one to steady herself. She took a deep breath and turned back to her brother. Kili had moved in front of her now.

"I'm telling you, you don't have to. We were not married I can't…" her head shot up and their eyes locked.

"I love you." She whispered. "I'm going to have to say goodbye somehow." His face softened.

"I love you too, with all my being."

"Then let me get through this."

/ / / / / / / / / / / /

She buckled the last strap on his breast plate and rested her hand on his shoulder, rubbing a thumb across the smooth metal. She had taken her time, making sure everything was perfect, and it had taken hours. He was dressed from head to toe in the finest battle gear, looking every inch the brave warrior she knew he was.

Turning to Dis she saw that Thorin was the same, and Fili was almost done too. She hadn't noticed her working so fast. Dis stopped what she was doing and walked around to the table, picking something up she handed it to Tauriel.

"Good luck." The dwarf said simply before returning to her son.

Tauriel looked down and smiled. A golden comb. She picked up a silver dish as she had seen Dis do and laid it beside his head.

"Don't do it!" Kili said from the corner where he'd been sitting silently. "Just leave it."

Tauriel smiled and again and lifted his head to take out the string she'd seen holding some of his hair back off his face.

She started taking strands and running the comb through each strand with as much attention as she could. It wasn't long before she felt the comb hitting something else metal. Putting it down a second she teased the hair through her fingers and unearthed a small silver bead.

"You won't get them out" Kili said watching her closely. She shut her eyes and flicked in his direction. He took the hint backing away slightly. She carefully took the bead out and put it into the tray.

It wasn't long until she had four identical beads sitting side by side and a mane of dark hair she could run her fingers through.

"His hair has not been so tamed since he was small enough for me to hold onto." Dis said from beside her.

"I probably would have let you brush it for me…" Kili said quietly.

"We wont do anything elaborate with it. He would not like that. Simple braids to hold it back and to sit his crown on." Dis continued, a hand reaching out to stroke his face.

"Clearly he did not care too much for his hair, so why did he wear these." Tauriel asked holding up the silver pan.

"They were a gift from Thorin, when he came of age." She said picking one up. "Sentimentality defeats stubbornness apparently. I didn't even know he'd kept them.

"Shall I tie off his braids with them?" she asked Dis, though directed her gaze at her beloved, who's face had grown solemn. He simply nodded.

"Two of them anyway. Keep two back. They would have been for his moustache." The matriarch said before walking away.

As she braided she could feel Kili moving towards her again.

"You know to my people, braiding is of incredible significance. It is one of the most intimate of acts." He whispered, though she didn't know why he bothered. She felt the hair on the back of her neck stand to attention with each word he spoke. "It is something almost as precious as laying with someone." He continued as the fingers ran through her hair.

"I'm sorry then it is so simple." She muttered.

"It is perfect." He replied and leant down to kiss her hand. A shiver ran through her and she stilled.

"wait…" she said frowning. "… you braided my hair in Laketown." She said praying Dis would not hear her, though Kili as so close she was barely making a sound.

"Yes I did."

"Though you knew the connotation."

"Your hair had come undone." He shrugged. "…and I knew then you were the only one I would ever allow braid my hair ever again."

Tears were falling down her cheeks again before she knew it.

/ / / / / / /

This was all followed by great stillness. The women sat at the feet of their loved ones in complete muteness as the night passed. She watched from the corner of her eye as Kili stood with a hand hovering over his mother's shoulder. She closed her eyes as his own face contorted in pain. She frowned as he started talking to someone at the side of the room, so quietly that she couldn't hear. Fili.

She had lost all concept of time when Dis rose.

"I am going to step outside a while my dear and allow you a final goodbye." Dis said walking over to her. "Take as long as you need."

Tauriel stood slowly, hands automatically going to her tiny bump. She watched as Kili followed his mother out. And then she was left all alone with them. She muttered a few elven blessings to the silent room, not sure how she remembered them. Then she felt the room change and she turned around. Kili had returned.

"You are doing so well my dear." He said walking towards her.

"I am going to say my goodbyes now. We don't know how long you'll be with me do we?" she said, voicing a realisation that had come to her hours before.

"I don't know how any of this works." She turned to the awaiting bodies.

"Ok then…" she nodded. "… firstly Throin, I truly believe you would have made the finest King we would have ever seen, Erebor would have prospered under you I feel and I hope someday you could have grown to accept me." She said looking at the resting King, bowing low to him. "Fili…" she stepped towards the golden haired dwarf, her throat beginning to tighten. "… I would have been so proud to call you brother. I know it would have taken time and you would have been incredibly protective of Kili but I would have done everything I could to show you how much I love him. Rest in peace dear prince." She bowed to him as well. Her breath hitched and her knees shook as she turned slowly to walk back to the final slab. Kili was waiting for her at his own head, he stayed silent. "Kili. Amrálimé." She smiled. "I cannot explain it, I doubt anyone ever could. But from the very beginning something connected us. Something that had been missing from my life until I met you. I am so grateful for all you gave… all you gave me. You changed my life in such a short time. You opened my heart and broke all my walls down." It took every ounce of strength she possessed to get through what was on her mind. But looking deep into his eyes while holding his ice cold hand she knew she had no other choice. "I don't want to live without you now, but I vow I will try. This child shall know all about their father and the dwarf he was. They will know all about his fiery spirit and his endless heart. They shall be the best of both of us I promise you that. And they will know just how desperately I loved you. The world shall know. Until we meet again." her hands shook as she rose them up for him to take. He walked to her quickly and wrapped his own around her, kissing her with everything he had. He had no words after that. They stood for another age holding each other, his hand resting on her stomach. "Goodbye." She whispered.

Her stomach lurched as she fell forward, catching herself she looked around. "Kili!"


	15. Chapter 15

Kili watched as they went through the motions, washing them down and dressing them. Once again he felt like he was intruding, it was only when Fili stood beside him looking on that he settled down.

"I don't think I want to watch this."

"You think we should leave?"

"I don't know." Fili frowned. "All I want to do is help her." He said looking at their mother.

"I know. It hurts to watch her so upset."

"Both of them." Fili said turning to look at the elf as she combed out his brothers hair.

That was the slowest night he'd faced since they'd returned. He'd never been comfortable around crying people anyway. Now it was just unbearable.

Fili walked alongside his own body, where his mother had rested his sword at his side. It gleamed in the candle light. He ran his fingers gently down it imagining how the cool metal would feel. They really were getting a warriors burial.

"I am going to step outside a while my dear and allow you a final goodbye." Their mother startled them both speaking so suddenly. "Take as long as you need." Kili looked quickly between the two women. Deciding to follow his mother for a moment, he was glad for as she reached the hall beyond she collapsed onto the floor sobbing.

Kili couldn't believe the show she'd put on for the elf. Fili sat beside her and started muttering soothing words that he knew would make no difference. He stayed a moment before remembering the elf they'd left alone.

/ / / / / /

This was what had held him back on earth. Not having this goodbye. Not having the chance to lay their hearts bare.

"Goodbye." She whispered as he held her tightly. He took a deep breath and felt something pass over him.

"Kili!" she said sounding startled. The sound came from behind him and that made him open his eyes. Tauriel had vanished from before him, spinning around he say her searching he room.

"Tauriel I'm here!" he said, grabbing her attention.

"Kili! Where have you gone?"

"I'm still right here, can you not see me?" his stomach sank as she looked past him once again.

"No…" she said her face stricken with fear. "…You're gone."

"That's ok! I'm standing beside you now and you can still hear me." He said his hand reaching for hers only to pass through. "I'm not gone yet."

"What's happened then?" she said, voice trembling.

"I think you have stepped back from the cusp of fading." He said matter-of-factly.

"I hope I am strong enough for this." Tauriel clutched her abdomen as he watched on helplessly.

Stepping back towards his remains she placed a gentle kiss on his lips and placed her forehead against his for the last time.

/ / / / / / /

"Kili…" Tauriel whispered staring hard at the floor at her feet.

"I'm still here don't worry." He said from the bench beside her.

Fili frowned and stared at them both. He had decided to leave his mother in peace as she was praying over them.

"What…."

"Tauriel cannot see me." Kili informed him, still staring at the elf.

"She can't?"

"Not anymore." He said sadly.

"That's good. That means she's going to be ok."

"yes." He watched as Kili's head hung lower, and his hand moved to sit beside Tauriel's. He had never seen such heartbreak on his brother's face.

"Fili?" the elf startled him. Could she hear him too?

"Yes… yes I'm here!" he said stepping closer to her.

"Is he here?" Tauriel asked looking towards where Kili sat.

"Yes, can you not hear him?"

"No. but I want to talk to him." She said, Fili watched as she stood up. "Where is he?" Kili looked up at his brother, puzzled.

"Standing to your left." Kili said, Fili stood taller as she turned and looked almost directly into his eyes.

"Fili I know you have been here all through this and I want to apologise for not speaking to you before. I guess you could say I am not used to speaking with spirits." She let a slight smile grace her face. "I want you to know how sorry I am you were cut down, I want to thank you for keeping Kili alive long enough for me to meet him." Kili snorted. "and I want to than… to thank you for loving him so much you lived through this with us." Her voice gave up and the tears started again. "Please know that this child, your niece or nephew will know how valiant you were and how great a dwarf they are related to. It is important to me you know that." She took a deep breath.

Fili stood silent. This was the first time anyone living had addressed him since they'd returned all those weeks ago. It was giving him chills.

"Is he still there?" Tauriel said, sounding slightly worried.

"Yes he's listening don't worry." Kili said solemnly.

"Tell… tell her thank you. And that, that means the world." Fili finally replied.

"He said thank you. And that what you said means the world to him." Kili parroted.

"I am sorry for all you have to go through. Stay strong sister" Fili said and bowed slightly to the elf.

"I…" Kili smiled broadly at his brother. "… I am sorry for all you have to go through. Stay strong… sister." He repeated again grinning widely.

Tauriel smiled in Kili's direction.

"And I think you two should know that you and this child have my blessing."

Kili stood and walked towards his brother, clasping his arm he pulled him towards him and rested his forhead on his brothers. Wrapping his other arm around Fili he held him tightly.

"Thank you." Was all the younger dwarf could say.

/ / / / / / / / / / /

"It is going to be overwhelming. You should know that. We did not get to give my grandfather or brother the burial they deserved, my father and husband didn't even get burials." Dis said as she brushed out Tauriel's hair. "This burial will represent all of those for the dwarves. There will be a great number here, many have travelled very far for it. You need to be prepared to be greatly outnumbered."

Tauriel rubbed little circles on her bump watching the dwarf in the mirror, she nodded. They were expected soon to join the others.

"Tauriel people see these as the end of the line of Durin. It will be immense and people will not know why you are there. You cannot take anything our kin say to heart, you are there as Kili's wife. People will realise that, and some will challenge it. Ignore that, it is not the time for it. We are there to honour them." She finished the braiding she had been doing and rested a hand on Tauriel's head. The elf frowned and turned to her.

"How will people know?" she asked.

"You wear his marriage braid." She said pulling her hair onto her shoulder. Tauriel was mesmerised by the intricate braiding she had done so quickly, she gasped as she recognised the beads tying it off at the end. Kili's two silver beads.

"I…" she smiled through her tears. "… it's beautiful."

"You wear it well." Dis smiled, tears in her own eyes. Tauriel reached up and ran a hand over her hair.

"I… I am so grateful for your tolerance of me Dis. But I still can't quite believe it."

"Why not my dear."

"You are Thorin Oakenshield's sister, it is well known how intolerant of elves he was."

"I don't see you as an elf. From what Dwalin and Balin told me I knew there would be something diverse about you and I decided I would not let it affect our relationship. You are my last link to my son." Tauriel stared in awe at her. "My youngest son was reckless and lively. Yet he was a very sensitive soul, who guarded his heart very closely. I knew his love, when given, would be pure and unclouded by lust or witlessness. I knew whoever won him would be the other half of him." There was tears flowing into her sparse beard. "It wouldn't have mattered to me if you were a hobbit or a squirrel! If my Kili loved you, I will love you too. I am your mother now."

Tauriel reached out and took Dis's hands into her own and kissed them.

"I am truly honoured." Tauriel said, standing up. They'd spent a good deal of time choosing her dress, making sure the slight difference in her figure wouldn't be noticed. She would be enough of a talking point as it is.

"That is another thing my dear. This child will upset the apple cart. They are the true heir of the mountain." Dis said, straightening her own dress.

"I don't want to think about that today. leave that problem for another time." Tauriel said slipping into her shoes. "Let us bid our warriors goodbye."

/ / / / / / / /

Kili and Fili stood side by side watching over the hundreds of dwarves that had gathered in the halls of Erebor. Kili looked towards the three stone coffins their company had just placed them in, side by side. Ready to be taken to their final resting places. Fili glanced over at the group standing at the centre, their brothers from their final quest, Dain and his family, their mother and Tauriel. The mourners were many, but he found that they were all that mattered.

Kili had never been to a burial like this before. There had been a few in the Blue Mountains but his mother had never let him go, she thought he'd do something to disturb things. So he had no idea of what would happen now. He moved his eyes back over to the red headed elf, she was crying silently. Her beautiful face was pale but stoic. He had seen the withering glances she was thrown as she took her place beside his mother, and he had also seen how she had ignored them. She turned to look over at Balin who had stepped forward to speak, and that's when he saw it. The beautiful braid adorning her hair. A marital braid, with his silver beads closing it off. His heart soared as he looked at it, the final proof of his mother's undying love.

"She would have been a wonderful wife." Fili said quietly.

"What did I ever do to deserve that love brother?" Kili asked.

"What did we do to deserve all this?" Fili replied with a shrug.

"… grant them eternal rest and undisturbed peace." Balin said loud and clear. ".. may they find their forefathers waiting to greet them and may their loved ones left behind be consoled by this celebration of three great lives." He said bowing to Dis and Tauriel. "To Thorin King under the mountain" he bellowed and the whole crowed rose in a cheer, startling the brothers. "To Prince Fili of Erebor!" he continued, Fili watching in awe as another cheer filled the room. "And to Prince Kili of Erebor." Kili shook his head at the noise. "To the Line of Durin. To the end of a great legacy." He shouted raising his fist.

A deafening roar sounded that could be heard from well past the boarders of Dale.


	16. Chapter 16

There was something about the stone door that made things all the more final. Tauriel stood staring at the symbols carved into the stone, she'd been told they were the dwarf's symbols. She recognised Fili's from his hair clip. Kili's from their now shared beads.

"You did so well" she closed her eyes as Kili's voice broke the silence.

"You are lying behind that stone slab." She said simply.

"Yes."

"I will visit you often." She said reaching out and running a hand over the carvings.

"You don't need to do that. You don't need to tie yourself to my grave. That is no life for you."

"It is my choice. Our child will grow up in these halls and this will be a place we visit often."

"We will have to go soon." She nodded slowly. "I… I'm sorry I cannot stay for the entirety of your pregnancy. I think if I do… I won't be able to leave."

"You shouldn't have been here for any of it. I am just grateful I got the chance to tell you…" she replied.

"My mother…"

"Is wonderful." The elf finished his sentence. "She has taken me into her family whole heartedly. And she already loves this child."

"I have something to ask of you. One last thing." She turned to when the voice was coming from. His voice was barely a whisper to her now.

"Anything my love."

"Don't name them for me. Be it boy or girl don't name them for me. Give them their own title and let them write their own story."

Tauriel smiled broadly.

"I hadn't given any thought to a name. Is that awful?" she sighed.

"No, there are many, many months ahead for all of that. But I will not be here and I wanted to say it. My parents broke family traditions and gave us our own names and it was a great start to life." Tauriel frowned.

"Don't dwarves have hidden names? Do you have a different name? Does our child need a name in your language?"

"Stop panicking!" he said, she heard a laugh run through his voice. "My mother will be your guide. You have nothing to fear."

"I wish I could see you." She said taking a deep breath. "I wish you were really here."

"There's no point wishing. We only have now."

"When did you grow so wise?"

"Death makes you see things differently." She moved to sit on a ledge further up the hall. He followed automatically.

"How do I know I haven't dreamed all this? How do I know I haven't descended into madness? If I told anyone else of this they would send me for tests."

"I guess you will never know. Do you believe I'll look over you?"

"Yes." She nodded.

"Well then what does it matter if this has been real. I will always be there. Madness or no."

"Is that your way of kindly telling me I am in fact mad?"

"Oh my darling, you went well past mad when you fell in love with me."

She smiled at the floor.

"Should I tell your mother her sons are here? Why have you not asked to speak to her." Kili didn't answer immediately.

"I shouldn't have been able to speak to you. I think I've done enough damage." Tauriel's head shot up.

"Oh…" she said her hand going to her mouth. "…I never returned it!" she said standing up and turning towards her room

"What?"

"The runestone. I never gave it to her." She climbed the stairs quickly.

"You don't have to. It is yours now. You need to keep it." Tauriel stopped walking.

"No I don't. I have my own talisman now. My own promise." She stated. "Your mother needs something too."

/ / / / / / / / / /

Tauriel stood at the great hall doorway, waiting for something. She could see Dain and Dis at the far end of the room speaking. She was afraid of interrupting. Afraid of putting a foot out of place.

"Tauriel?" she looked up as she heard her name. Dis was smiling at her. She could feel the tips of her ears redden as she walked towards them.

"Good evening." She said bowing to them both.

"Tauriel, it is good to finally meet you properly." The new King under the mountain bowed to her in return.

"Yes I apologise for not coming to you sooner your highness." She continued.

"Think nothing of it!" he said in a thick brogue. "You weren't well." He cast an eye at Dis.

"Understandably." He continued. Tauriel couldn't help but smile at Dis, how much ground work had she done.

"Thank you."

"I have had a great discussion with the lady Dis, and I want you to know you have nothing to fear here." Tauriel smiled wider at the wild haired dwarf.

"Thank you so much." She was at a loss for words.

"Now I believe you have seen very little of Erebor." He said picking up a cloak from the high table beside them.

"Yes sir, I have seen little outside of my chambers and the mourning rooms."

"Well the mountain is your home now, please make yourself familiar with every nook and cranny! And if you need a guide don't hesitate to call on me."

"I will my lord." She replied, he threw on his cloak and bowed once again.

"Ladies"

They watched as the dwarf left the room.

"How did you…" the elf started, turning back to Dis.

"Don't worry." She brushed her off.

"Does he know…" Tauriel's hand moved to the well hidden sign of new life.

"No that will be your hurdle to jump I'm afraid" Tauriel nodded. "Now what brought you here?" Dis asked picking up a goblet from the table and drinking from it.

"I have something belonging to you and I wanted to return it." The elf said digging into the folds of her tunic.

"what is it dear?"

Tauriel clasped the stone tightly and pulled it out.

"Kili gave me this, but it should return to you." She said holding out a closed fist. Dis frowned and lowering her drink moved forward. Tauriel slowly opened her hand, the runestone lying gleaming on her flat palm.

"Oh…" Dis's hand moved to cover her mouth. "you… this…" Tauriel saw tears spring to her eyes.

"I forgot to give it back I'm sorry."

"He gave it to you?"

"Yes, I was going to give it back to him I know it was…."

"No I'm just surprised he managed to hang on to it." She managed a smile. Reaching into her own gown she produced her own closed fist. "I knew Fili would mind his, but Kili I had my doubts."

Tauriel smiled as she saw the identical stone in her hand. Fili's.

"All I wanted was for them to return to me." She said looking at the two stones in her hand. "My two precious sons."

"Kili told me. He said it was a promise. He had no intention to break it."

"And he gave this to you?" she asked still staring at them.

"Yes…" Tauriel paused debating telling her story. "… after Laketown was destroyed I saw the dwarves that had stayed behind off to Erebor. They were boarding a boat and… Kili approached me and asked me to go with him. He said he wasn't afraid of how he felt, that I made him feel alive and that he loved me. Amrálimé…" she whispered. Dis looked up at the elf. Tauriel was once again fighting through the tears. "Then he gave me that and told me to keep it. As a promise."

Dis frowned and Tauriel grew worried.

"I'm sorry…" she started.

"You should keep this." Dis cut her off, holding her hands out towards the elf. "He bequeathed it to you."

Tauriel finally smiled again and reaching out closed the darrowdam's hand around the precious stones.

"He only lent it. It belongs to you." She said. Dis looked deep into her eyes and stayed silent a while.

"Have you eaten?" She said breaking contact after a comfortable silence. Tauriel gave her some space.

"I find my appetite still quite diminished." She admitted.

"You need to be eating properly! If not for you then for the babe." She picked up a plate and started piling fruit onto it. Tauriel smiled and took it. "Sit sit."

"Where is everyone?"

"Resting sore heads I would say."

"I would like to tell Thorin's company about the baby."

"Good." She nodded. "I think that's the best."

"Today"

"Are you sure? So soon."

"I am growing more rapidly than I anticipated. I don't want them to feel I am hiding it from them."

"As you wish."

/ / / / / / \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

Kili stood at the opposite end of the great hall watching them. He could just make out what they were saying but he didn't move closer. He'd decided on the walk up here he needed to start leaving her be. He'd told her as much, saying he wouldn't be with her constantly now. Preparing them both. But that may have been a white lie. He wouldn't speak. But he couldn't stay away. Not yet.

"Kili?" he turned to see Fili walking towards him.

"Our mother is remarkable isn't she?"

"Extremely. I will never forget how strong she was when father died, she has been holding things together ever since."  
"I wish I could remember him." Kili frowned.

"You barely met him." Fili responded. "I would be surprised if you did."

"Still…" Fili watched his brothers face as it turned back to Tauriel as she rubbed her growing bump.

"Seem's to be the fate of the line of Durin. Growing up with one parent."

"Do you think they'll look like me or her?"

"For the child's sake I hope her." He said shoving his younger brother lightly.

"ha, me too. That beautiful hair should be carried on."

"I was thinking and I distinctly remember you saying you couldn't see the lure of elven women. All high cheekbones and too thin…"

"Yes. But when they contain the fire and spirit such as Tauriel's I can overlook my predispositions."

"I'm sure you can." The brothers looked on as Tauriel was fed by their mother "No matter what, that child shall be exceptional. Probably as beautiful and deadly as their mother with a heart as big as their fathers."

"You are trying to soften the blow when you tell me it's time to go."

"You did say after the burial." The darker of the two turned to his brother.

"I have to see her properly settled. Then we can go."

"Kili we don't know how to go. We may be trapped here. You have to stop changing deadlines."

"We won't be trapped here. We're meant to be gone. That's why she can't see me anymore." He sighed. "If you want to move on, please do."

"I told you. We're staying together."


	17. Chapter 17

She stood at the end of a long table, ten dwarves sitting in silence looking at her. She swallowed a lump in her throat. Sending a glace behind he she searched for Kili, knowing she wouldn't see him.

"Dear why have you called us all here?" Bofur asked, he was sitting closest to her. This woke her up and she lifted her head high.

"Thank you all very much for coming to meet me. I wish I had done this sooner." She started looking around the table. She recognised all the faces, but barely knew them. "I know you have all heard many stories about me, and have heard many versions of events. I want to set the record straight. I am Tauriel of Mirkwood and I loved Kili." She said simply resting her fists on the table.

Many of the company shifted in their seats. She looked around again, only to be met with the briefest nod from Dwalin.

"I know you were his closest companions and I want you to know everything."

"Trying to win us round…" grunted Gloin, earning him a dig from Bifur.

"Continue lass." Balin said with a gesture of his hand.

"Kili and I spent many hours talking when you were captive in Mirkwood. Then when he was left behind in Laketown we realised we were destined for each other. Kili asked for my hand and I gladly gave it. We were to be married after the war." She looked back down at the table trying to steady herself. "Kili and I never spoke about the differences between our people, I know you may say that was because we did not know each other long. But it was because we did not see it when we were together. I never thought I would have to stand up for our love alone." She say Dori look around a the others, still no one spoke. "I truly loved your young prince. I did not expect it, and when I realised I was terrified, but I cannot deny it. And now I find I want know those he saw as family. I understand it will take a lot of time for you to accept me, if you do at all. But I want to tell you I will try my hardest to show you my loyalty to the dwarfs." She said eyes latching on Bofur this time. The dwarf smiled. "Finally I want to tell you all before I tell anyone else…" she said. "I am with child."

This was what shook the room and broke the unnatural silence that had been over them.

"You're what!" Gloin stood up knocking off Ori.

"A child!" Bofur said even louder drowing him out. Bombur and Dwalin simply gave a cheer.

Balin was the first to reach her, she was nearly shaking as he took her hands.

"The line of Durin lives." He said smiling brightly. "You carry such a blessing child. Thank you."

He continued bringing a huge smile to her face.

"Congratulations." Bofur said startling her but hugging her tightly. She laughed as he spun her around.

"Be careful with her!" she heard Balin shout! She found herself facing Oin then who took her hand to steady her, ear trumpet in the other hand.

"I had a notion lass, but the elven healers weren't big talkers." He said. "Let me know if you need anything."

"thank you." She said beaming. Ori approached her next.

"May you both be healthy." The timid dwarf said to her, she noticed a slight blush crossing his face. When she saw the next dwarf in front of her, her smile faded. Dori stood with his hands on his hips studying her. She stood tall and faced him.

"Thank you for talking to us. I wish you good health." He said bowing very slightly. Her heart leapt. She had bridged the gap between one of them at least. Dwalin stood behind him, clearly trying to suppress a smile.

"You have my protection my lady. Anything you may need." He said bowing as well.

She was blown away by the response, though she did notice Gloin staying to the side of the chamber. There seemed to be a renewed joy amongst them, it was just what she could have hoped for. Bombur appeared seemingly from nowhere with a large tray of tankards and placed them on the table.

"Everyone." Balin said, silencing the room. He raised his tankard. "To the heir of Durin." he said loudly. "and to their mother." He tipped his head at Tauriel. He raised his tankard again and a cheer ran through the room. She knew the tips of her ears would be red now.

"Now lass, we would normally spend the night consoling the poor father because of his fate and telling him horror stories of sleepless nights and cantankerous wives ." Bofur smiled at her, "but as we can't would you mind if we drank in Kili's honour." He looked around the room to find a general agreement.

"Of course! Though I shall have to take my leave. I think it is time to tell the king."

"Come back afterwards." Bofur tipping his hat to her.

/ / / \ \\\ \\\\\

Dain just looked at her, not speaking. The silence was deafening.

She looked down at her hands, then back up at the King. She'd called for Kili after leaving the dwarves but he hadn't answered. He'd told her he was going to step back a bit, not follow her everywhere. But she needed him for these things. She needed him beside her.

"My Lord I…" he raised a hand.

"With child." He repeated she nodded. "Prince Kili's child."

"Yes your highness. I apologise for not telling you sooner. I was getting used to the thought myself."

"I am pleased for you Tauriel. It is a joy like no other to have a child of your own." Her stomach unclenched at his kind words.

"I am still torn my lord if I am honest. I fear the child will be too much like Kili. Yet I also fear the child will not be enough like him."

"Only time will tell." He clasped her shoulder. "Now I don't think we should announce it to the masses just yet. it is still quiet early."

"Yes I agree. And I don't think anyone can predict how this pregnancy will go." She said quietly.

"Do not worry. That is always key." He said smiling brightly at her. "Now as for the throne…"

She held her hands up and stopped him in his tracks.

"With all respect King Dain. I do not want to discuss the succession. I know the talk will be of the line of Durin, but I would rather not discuss it until much, much later. You know Kili and I were not officially married, this child is both of two worlds and legally illegitimate. Bearing a healthy child is my main concern. As far as I see it, you are King Under the Mountain."

The ginger dwarf smiled at her again.

"I am sure you have the full confidence of the Lady Dis, but my wife will also be at your disposal if needs be. she will arrive in the next few days."

Tauriel took his hand and squeezed it gently.

"Thank you. I cannot tell you how unexpected all this positive reaction is. I was almost ready to leave the mountain."

"You have made a powerful friend in Dis. And I hope you have learned we look after our own."

The king left her standing alone in the great hall, it was refreshing not to feel too big for her surroundings for a minute. Her breathing was still hurried and she was a little light headed. Telling everyone had taken a lot more than she'd anticipated.

"Kili…" she whispered.

/ / / / / /\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

He stood silently behind her, like he had for hours. He had just stood as his former company passed through him to congratulate her. He had smiled as Bofur had spoken about drinking in his honour.

He stood beside her in the hall, in pain as she called out for him. This was going to be agony. He had to start preparing for it. Watching her talking so confidently to Dain, and standing tall before his fellow dwarves had only made him fall more in love with her.

"Kili…" she whispered, though the sound echoed through the great hall.

"I'm here my love."

"Where have you been." She said frowning. "you left me alone to face your kin."

"I was behind you the entire time Tauriel. I would have spoken up if you had needed me"

"You really think I didn't need you?" her frown grew deeper.

"Tauriel, I have to leave you. You will have to face this alone. Though it kills me to think of that it is what will have to happen."

"I know, I just don't think I'll ever be ready."

"You told them all. They took it very well." She finally smiled, he took a step closer to her, letting his fingers brush through hers.

"Don't you see?" she asked still looking at the ground he knew was between them.

"See what…"

"What you did, coming back. Bending the path of life itself. You have blessed our child. Every light in the sky looks down on them because of the love you have proved." Her hand raised to her middle. "The Valar have blessed it with great love before it is even born because of what you did for us."

He couldn't say a word. "You have given this child the protection of the world from beyond the grave."

He looked up at her radiant face, her pale skin glowed in the candlelight and her hair shone even brighter than usual. She could still take his breath away without even trying.

"If that is so, then I am glad some good has come from it. For from where I stand it looks like I have caused nothing but more pain. I fear this parting will be even more painful than the last.

"Every extra second I have gotten with you will be worth it." She said looking up, somehow slmost looking directly at him.

"Then it's time to say goodbye."


	18. Chapter 18

He stood on the balcony looking down over entrance to Erebor. There was a guards patrolling everywhere, things were still quite tense, but he smiled as he saw a few dwarves coming and going through the gates. Life had really come back to the mountain.

"I don't know it just doesn't all seem right does it?" he turned his head as he heard two voices he didn't recognise.

"What doesn't seem right?" the two guards were patrolling around the balcony, they looked even younger than Kili.

"She's an elf? Don't you think it's all a bit odd? I mean what will the child look like?!" Kili's chest filled and he strode towards them ready to defend his family. The company had managed to keep the secret a month. Now everyone knew. Though no one seemed to really mind. Dis's approval meant the world it seemed, and Dain's simply confirmed everything.

"Ah give over would ya!" the other dwarf replied. "Didn't your own sister marry a man! And their children look just fine! Happiest couple I've ever met." Kili felt himself calm. "You never met the prince. You can't be judge on his wife." He nodded indicating the conversation was over, as the other guard shrugged lightly. Kili almost felt a smile coming to his face as the two of them walked through him. Continuing on their rounds.

He soon turned his gaze back to the lands before the mountain, where much of the fighting had taken place. He had seen bodies and weapons strewn across that land

"Thorin would be so proud." He didn't even flinch when he heard Fili's voice cut through the silence, sudden appearances had become second nature to both of them.

"The mountain is filling back up quickly." Kili nodded.

"I heard Oin talking to Bofur about the new Durin. Has Tauriel shared the news?"

"With the company and Dain yes."

"How did they take it?"

"Startlingly well!" Kili let out a laugh. "All of them. I think I even saw Gloin smile as he left the room."

"Wow quite the achievement."

"She thinks I have blessed our child by coming back from death." He could feel Fili studying him.

"I have heard stranger tales."

"I can see it all so clearly you know." Kili looked straight down to the gates. "Our life here. It would have taken years, for it all to settle. The baby would have helped Thorin come around to Tauriel. We would have married and welcomed the child together. You would have married eventually and our children would have been as close as we are. We would reprimand them constantly for getting in trouble yet secretly talk about how like us they were." He smiled. "You and I would have travelled middle earth for Thorin. We would have seen everything, and then returned back here to our families. We would have grown old watching over our people, you leading and me following you like we have our uncle."

"It all sounds so simple." Fili stepped closer to his brother and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Let me say goodbye then we'll go" Kili looked at him with tears in his eyes. Fili didn't even now that was possible in their state. "Then we'll go" he repeated.

/ / / / /\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

If hadn't taken too long to find her, she'd become a creature of habit over the last few weeks as he'd distanced himself from her. He stopped at the entrance to the balcony watching her, how she'd found this roof garden was anyone's guess. It was on an easily missed balcony off the royal quarters. But it was beautiful. Vines and bushes grew through cracks in the stone and colourful flowers had been completely unimpaired by years of desolation. It was better than any Eden he could have created for her. And it would help her survive. He smiled as she bent down to lift the head of a lily, and her hand instinctively went to her fast growing stomach. Pregnancy suited her to no end, he found she was only growing more beautiful with each passing day. He would happily stare at her glowing face for hours though quite often it was marked with sadness.

"Do you know what this is?" She asked touching the white flower gently. Her voice shocked him to no end. He stepped into the garden about to respond when she continued. "It's a star lily. I have not seen such a flower since I was a little girl." He stilled as she rubbed circles on their bump. She was talking to the baby, he smiled. "How funny they should grow here too." She smiled. "I'm talking to you both Kili."

"How did you..."

"My sense of you has heightened. I felt your presence."

"Surely that is cheating."

"You hear that child? Your daddy says I cheat." She smiled. "How will we respond?"

"Daddy?" he questioned stepping in towards her.

"Yes I heard one of the children in Laketown calling their father that. I quite liked it." She eased herself back up to standing. It was only then he spotted the bag at her feet.

"What is that?" he asked and she sighed.

"More presents from the company. From Ori to be specific." She pulled a leather bound journal from the bag. "he made a journal to record the child's early years." She smiled and ran a hand over it.

"He stills feels bad for spilling your secret then."

"He has been so good, the baby already has more knitted wear than anyone needs."

"Yes but everything is dwarfen sized! It may all be useless." He was standing beside her now, oth of them still facing the lilies.

"perhaps. Did you see what Dwalin delivered last night?" she asked.

"Yes I did. I have never seen a finer crib." He nodded.

"It is just like what you wanted to make." She whispered.

"You heard all that?"

"I could see it too, as you described it. I think that is why I woke up, I wanted to try and grasp that."

"Imagine we knew nothing of the baby then." She was looking down now, around where his head would be if she could see him.

"Kili you know that elves choose one partner in their lives. That once they marry that's it." She said moving to sit on a low wall.

"Marry?"

"They never love another." She continued.

"You never married…" he said sadly trying to predict what she was trying to say.

"You also don't seem to know much about elven marriages." She smiled "Elves are considered married once they… after they…" he grinned looking up at the reddening tips of her ears.

"Do what we did in the boat." He finished her sentence.

"A story I shall not be telling our child." She smirked wider.

"A sentiment I shall not argue. Our daughter shall never know such things." He nodded fiercely though she could not see him.

"Or son. But I have considered us married since that night."

"You did…"

"Yes. I won't pretend I took the decision lightly. Yet it was the easiest decision I have ever made in my life." He could see tears forming in the corner of her eye.

"But you didn't come on the boat with me. You didn't say…"

"I had journeys to finish before we could start a new one. I wanted a clean start for us."

"But we never got it."

"I knew I would find you. I just wish I had known more."

"I would give the moon and stars to marry you." He said quietly.

"You put no mass in the stars."

"That was before I was enlightened, and discovered their true worth."

She turned her head, letting her braids fall wildly the light catching the beads and distracting him.

"Then do." He frowned.

"Do what?"

"Marry me." His jaw dropped.

"Taur…"

"No think on it, you are here technically. I already wear your braids, by my standards we are already married and we have your mothers blessing. Let us be married in your eyes too." She grew more excited.

"We need the King to declare it and I don't think Dain's tolerance will run to ghosts…"

"Then call Fili!" she shrugged as if it was the simplest solution in the world. He had never seen her so animated. "The heir of a king may marry us."

"My darling you cannot even see me! This is…"

"The perfect way to say goodbye." She said softly.

/ / / / /\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\

Fili beamed at them both, he found he couldn't wipe the grin from his face.

"Now Tauriel, you can still change your mind. You don't have to do this." He said looking at the elf, she smiled.

"He said…" Kili started only to be stopped by Tauriel's expression.

"Don't worry! I can hear him." She said eyebrows raised "Thank you Fili but I assure you I have made my choice."

Kili smiled at her, wishing silently she could look into her eyes properly.

"Fili…" he said with a warning tone in his voice.

"Right sorry. We are here today to join for…" Fili stopped short.

"Forever. You may say it." Tauriel finished for him. "We will be joined forever." She nodded.

"I never thought I'd be invisible on my wedding day." Kili said shifting on his feet.

"Just think how crazy I must look. Speaking with two spirits." She smiled, always reassuring him.

"We are here today to join Prince Kili of Erebor, heir to the line of Durin son of Dis, sister son of Thorin King Under the Mountain and Tauriel of Mirkwood. Would you like to say your vows to each other." Tauriel decided to start.

"I grew up with Thranduil and Legolas as my only comfort, and I grew to not expect anything more from my life. I expected to serve the King and guard Mirkwood for the rest of my days. Then you literally fell into the middle of my world and changed everything." She said softly, she oddly found it easier to speak such deep truths when she couldn't see him. "You made me realise life didn't have to be so strictly planned and you showed me I was worthy of love…" she closed her eyes as tears threatened again. "…I owe so much happiness to you. And I know what comes next will be the greatest pain I shall ever know. But I will not regret a second."

He felt his heart soar as she spoke and a warmth seemed to build around him. She stopped talking but her eyes stayed glued to the ground.

"Risking my heart with you is the greatest thing I have ever done. Possibly the most reckless, but most definitely the best. I never saw my parents together but I knew even still that I wanted a love like that. An all-consuming love that still proved so strong though one half was long gone." He stopped and laughed lightly. "Though I didn't really want the same circumstances. And I have said to Fili that I finally understood what my mother had. You are the rest of me. You are the pieces I didn't know were missing, you are probably the last person I could have imagined myself someday married to. And I am glad because if I had known you were coming, I would have wished my life away. I love you my darling. Thank you for making me whole." He said, his chest now painful from the amount of emotions he was feeling.

Fili looked between the two of them, his own smile now faded. How could the world let these two could be separated again. How would either survive it?

"As Heir to the King under the Mountain I do declare these tw…"Tauriel looked up as Fili spoke and gasped suddenly.

"Kili!" she said. He lept forward.

"What is it! Is it the child…"

"No…" she was beaming, "I can see you. You're glowing." Her heart flipped as she looked at his face, a golden glow radiating all around him.

"You can?" he asked as her hand rose to cup his cheek. She looked deep into his eyes.

"Hello Amrálimé." She said in barely a whisper. Fili smirked and continued.

"I do declare these two eternally bound." He looked between them again. "Kiss her would you!"

They laughed and leaning down slightly Tauriel waited for him to rise his own head to meet her.

The kiss was sweet and loving, rather like their first. Kili closed his eyes committing the moment to memory. As they broke apart they stayed looking deep into each others eyes, trying to communicate everything left to be said.

"Kili…" Fili said eventually breaking the moment. Kili turned slowly to the sound of his brothers voice only to see a familiar sight. The large wooden door and a bright white light. "…it's time." Kili nodded. "Tauriel mind our mother, and yourself. It was an honour to know you." Fili said before stepping towards the door. "See you soon Kili."

"Goodbye Fili." Tauriel whispered, her eyes glued to the door. They watched in silence as the blonde dwarf walked through the wooden door, the white light blinding them for a moment.

Kili swallowed the lump in his throat then turned back to her. He placed his hands on her growing stomach and kissed it lightly.

"I have to go Amrálimé. Look after your mother. She is starlight. Don't let her fade." Tauriel was crying freely now "Goodbye Tauriel. You have my heart. I will always be there." he said giving her a final kiss before stepping away towards the door. She opened her mouth to speak but found her mouth dry.

As the white light filled the garden she fell to her knees, the pain in her chest becoming unbearable.


	19. Chapter 19

She ran down the hall long blue ribbon trailing behind her, her tiny kitten following the end of it. As she stopped to turn the corner the small cat crashed into the wall.

"Shh Thimble." She hushed the cat before bending down to pick it up. "It's early, no one else will be up." She rubbed his little brown head and pulled the ribbon up, wrapping it around her wrist. "And after the feast they had last night I wouldn't want to be the one to waken them." She tapped the kitten's nose lightly. "Let's go"

She skipped down the hall twirling as she went as the cat playfully clawed at the bobbles on the front of her dress. Her hands ran along the marble wall as she went, speeding down the well familiar path. She made her way deeper and deeper down into the mountain, relishing the familiar cold that crept around her the further she went. She got to her destination and stopped a few paces short. She looked at the large stone door and took a minute to step forward.

"Good morning Daddy." She said sitting in the middle of the hall. "Thimble came today I hope that's ok. Ma said you would love him. Uncle Dwalin gave him to me when he got back from Dale." She stroked the kitten's nose once more then let him down on the ground. "Today's the day daddy. I'm sure of it. The star lilies will be in full bloom." She beamed. "I know it's silly but it's my favourite time of the year." She started twisting the ribbon around. "It was the anniversary of your death yesterday. Though it is most remembered as the anniversary of the Battle. We lit candles for you in the garden. Though I'm sure you know that. One for you and Uncle Thorin and Uncle Fili." Her smile faded and she stopped fidgeting. Ma was so brave Daddy. You would be so proud of her. At least I like to think you would be. I know this time of year is very hard for her though, so if the lilies could bloom it would be perfect. They make her so happy." The child looked up and down the hall. "Daddy, grandmamma has grown worse. Mama says it is because her heart is so broken that her love for me is the only thing keeping her together. I think that even that may not be enough anymore." She looked sadly at the stone door again. "Ma has a broken heart too, I know that. But she says I fill it up. I seal the cracks. I miss you I do though I never knew you, so I can't imagine how they survive." she smiled sadly. "Right I better get to the garden and see the lilies!" she said scooping up the small kitten. "I love you Daddy." She kissed her fingers and placed them over his sign.

/ / / / / / / / / /\\\\\ \\\\\ \\\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \ \ \ \

She clasped on the second bead and giving herself the one over made her way out of her chambers down the well-trod path. As she reached the burial chambers she smiled. Bending down she picked up the blue ribbon left in the middle of the hallway.

Her daughter was an early riser, always had been, she'd started coming to visit her father by herself in the early morning years ago.

"Good morning Kili." She said resting her hand on the cold stone door. "Good morning Fili." She added quickly. "The battle feast was last night, it was their latest one yet. how can it have been twenty years already. You are all still very present in the thoughts of all. Your mother did not attend. She keeps to her chambers most of the days now. She only comes out for her hours with her granddaughter. I worry." She frowned. "I must visit Dale this week, Dain wants me to take the coronation gift to King Bain. Life goes on my love." She said sadly. "I must go. See you tomorrow." She kissed her fingers and placed them over his sign, closing her eyes to quench the tears as she did.

/ / / / / / / /\\\\\ \\\\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \\\ \ \ \ \

He stood watching as the child led her mother by the hand into the balcony garden, both beaming. Yes he'd seen it all. After an oddly joyful reunion with his brethren past the door he'd been let in on a secret. His own father, a man he know got to know, had taken him aside and told him just what he needed. The way he himself had watched over his young family for all those years. The link and soul saving window he still had. The way spirits looked down on their loved ones.

So he'd seen it all, he'd seen Tauriel grow out of all her dresses again and again as her stomach grew, he'd seen her collapse in the great hall and he'd paced up and down as Oin had examined her and the baby. He'd stood by the door as their beautiful, perfect daughter came into the world, and he'd stood at her side as the new princess was presented to the dwarves of Erebor. He'd watched wordlessly as she'd grown quickly, becoming wise beyond her years, beautiful as her mother and carefree as her father. He'd even watched helplessly as Tauriel cried at night when things became too much.

It was different than before, he knew she would never see him of speak to him again, he was even less there than he had been before. But he didn't care. He was content in being able to see them. His heart swelled as the twenty year old delf hugged her mother tightly. She was so beautiful, the perfect blend of their two kinds. Taller than any dwarf, yet not as tall as any elf child. Limbs lithe and graceful like her mother, yet still strong and worth of dwarfen work. Her hair, the same stain as his own, was already past her waist and curling at the ends. She hated having it tied back in anyway, but was lucky in that it seemed to style effortlessly like her mother. It was no surprise to any one that there was no sign of a beard on her striking face, which also bore her father's immense smile and mothers forest eyes. She was loved by all and had the most gracious of hearts. To him she was perfect. A perfect he helped to create, and a perfect he would watch over forever.

His wife and daughter took one last look at the lilies and smiled before walking hand in hand from the garden.

"Goodnight my loves." He said watching them go.

She stopped and frowning turned around to where the sound had come from. Tauriel stopped walking too and turned to see what had happened.

"Ami? What is it?" she asked smiling at the young girl.

"I thought I heard something." She said puzzled.

"Twas only the wind." Tauriel smiled. "Or a watchful spirit." The child laughed lightly. "Come on Amrâlimê, we'll be late for supper with Dis."

"Yes Mama." She said taking one last look around her. Kili was sure he caught her eye.

"Goodnight Amrâlimê." He breathed.

~THE END~

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Hi everyone! I just wanted to say thank you all so much for reading, following or favouriting this fic! This story has meant so much to me and I will be sorry to see it end but I know it happens! Your reviews have all been so amazing for me to read and I really don't think I can ever thank you all enough for sticking with my little story!

Thank you all!

All My Love

Grace (bonesmad)


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